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Packing for college is not fun, Domingo and my parents keep telling me I have packed too much but I feel like it’s not enough. I am going to be there for four years and I need all of my stuff to make it feel like home, but reluctantly I allowed my mum to help me sort the necessary from the unnecessary. As the final day at home approached my mum became very sullen and would mope about the house, which was very unlike her.
I knew what was wrong with her, she didn’t want me to go and had told me on several occasions. I had replied to these comments with as much kindness as I could and I promised that I would be back on holidays to visit. She was upset because according to her both of her babies were leaving her and she was going to miss us too much, but Theo and I both convinced her that it would be ok, we would both be back and in the meantime Theo would be there for her to mother and fuss over.
Lucas, Dom and I were leaving for college a week before classes were due to start, we had decided to drive there together and stop at a few landmarks along the way. When everything was packed into the car and we had said our goodbyes, I promised my mum that I would be back as often as possible then we left.
I was so excited to start college, especially because unlike most people I didn’t need to leave behind my boyfriend, I got to do this with him by my side. I also had my best friend with me and Lucas and I were planning some great nights out in California, he had promised to help me drag Dom along too.
The road trip to Stanford was amazing we took the long way round and passed through Las Vegas, stopping at the Treasure Island hotel. We had all been saving for a while for this trip and when we got there we went straight to the strip to look around. We couldn’t drink or gamble because we were underage but the hotels had a lot of other entertainment so the few days we stopped there were far from boring.
The rest of the trip went by fast, Lucas drove us straight to the university without any more stops so that we could get settled into our dorm room before classes start. We were all sharing a room with 3 single beds but I knew that Dom and I would end up squeezing into one bed, so when we arrived we all dumped out stuff on what would have been my bed.
The dorm room wasn’t much, it was so small and I had a feeling that stress levels may rise from time to time when all three of us were cramped in here. We settled in pretty quickly, unpacking all of our stuff and putting it in our own section of the room, we were going to have to learn to be around each other and in each other’s space, as we were used to having our own rooms.
The first term went pretty quickly, there was plenty of partying and studying happening. Dom, Lucas and I rarely spent any time in the dorm room. I was in medical school and I needed to take that seriously so the majority of my time was spent in the library and more often than not Dom and Lucas would just join me. At the weekends I allowed myself a break and that’s when the partying would begin, it was so much fun and college parties were even wilder than I thought they would be.
As time went by the first year was due to end soon, exams were coming up quickly. I had put my partying weekends on hold for now to concentrate on cramming in extra hours of studying. Domingo seemed to be getting stressed and kept slamming books down with a huff if he couldn’t understand something properly. Placing a hand on top of his to calm him down I would then pick the book back up and asked him if I could help him. Sometimes I was able to help but because Dom and Lucas were taking different classes to me, he would usually have to go and find Lucas to finish up studying with him.
I love being around Dom, he is the love of my life but when I am trying to study and he is constantly slamming down books distracting me, I prefer it when him and Lucas have some alone time. Most nights I would be in the library until midnight because I really wanted to pass these exams and with flying colours not just scraping by. Domingo was in the same position so it didn’t affect our relationship, there was no strain placed upon us and when we did get to spend some time alone it made it that much more special to us.
I had received some information about my brother a few weeks ago which cheered me up slightly and I think that is why I was dealing with the upcoming exams so well. Elliot had called home to let everyone know that he was still alive and that he had been given a new role, he was being trained up to be a medic in the camp hospital. My mum had told him how proud we all were of him and begged him to be safe as this role could potentially be more dangerous as he had to go out into the field to collect the injured soldiers.
I had told the boys about Elliot’s call and Dom was pleased for him but Lucas looked as if the news was not welcomed. Both boys were slightly worried about his new role but only because he would have to go out into the field more often, Lucas looked worried about this and I had to reassure him that Elliot would be fine. I had to believe that he would be fine and if I had to convince them two as well then so be it, Elliot would be fine.
Lucas seemed a bit down lately, he hadn’t really been himself for several months now but when I approached him he brushed me off and I put it down to the stresses of college life. The week before the exams and just after our conversation about Elliot, Lucas disappeared. I have no idea where he went but he didn’t come back to the dorm before Dom and I fell asleep and he was gone again before we woke up.
I was beginning to think that Lucas had more than brotherly feelings towards Elliot but until he wanted to tell me I was going to keep those assumptions to myself. Elliot wasn’t gay as far as I was aware, he only ever had girlfriends at school and he had no reason not to come out seen as I had already done it. I hoped my assumptions were wrong, I loved Lucas and I didn’t want him to fall in love with someone that couldn’t reciprocate those feelings.
As we entered exam week I saw less and less of Lucas, I hope that he is off studying somewhere or I hope that he has met someone. I didn’t want him to fail his exams because of his mood lately, Domingo was too laid back for his own good, he was doing exams like everyone else but he was showing none of the stress that other people were, which was odd considering how he acted when studying. It was slightly annoying because my own stress levels were on the rise and I was hoping that I could get control of them before I failed everything.
When the exams are over Lucas is planning on going home for the summer, Dom and I planned on stopping here but I think I have changed my mind. College is fun but I need to get away for a while, plus I miss my mum, dad and Theo so I think I will try and convince Domingo to come back home with Lucas and me, I don’t think he will take much convincing though.
I was currently sitting on my bed and Lucas had finally come back to the dorm and stayed for more than five minutes. I watched him as he tried to study, we were halfway through the exams now and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. Domingo was currently in his exam, it was a specialised exam as he wanted to be a geography teacher, Lucas wanted to be an History teacher so he didn’t need to sit this exam.
“Do you want to tell me what’s been up with you lately?” I asked him.
“Just exams you know.” He shrugged.
“Why have you been avoiding me and Domingo then, you two take the same exams and he told me you won’t study with him?” I asked.
“I just prefer to be alone ok?!” He snapped slightly.
“We always do everything together were best friends?” I asked shocked.
“Well some of us aren’t just best friends anymore Charlie! I hate feeling like the third wheel when in the meantime the person I love doesn’t….never mind.” He snapped again.
“Were trying, we didn’t mean to make you feel like that we love you too. Who are you in love with Lucas maybe I can help?” I asked trying not to get upset.
“I am sorry Charlie I didn’t mean that, you and Dom are being great. I am just not in my right mind at the moment but don’t worry about it ok.” His face softened and he got up and left the room.
I watched as he walked away without any further explanation, the end of this college year could not come quick enough. Looking back it had been just as much fun as I had thought it would be but because I wanted to take my studying seriously I knew the partying might have to be cut down a bit next year, the work load was only going to get more intense and I already felt like my relationship with Lucas was suffering. I would talk to Dom about it and we can start to make more of an effort towards our best friend, he is clearly hurting over something and we haven’t once asked him about it.
Feeling thoroughly awful now I decided to drop the revision for the time being, Dom’s exam would be ending soon and I wanted to go meet him for something to eat. Grabbing my keys and phone I followed in Lucas’ footprints and walked out the door and down the halls towards the exam rooms.
Turns out, all of that revision paid off and we may or may not have been stressing a little too much because Lucas, Dom and I passed our exams with very good grades. This and the fact that Dom and I were going home with him made Lucas cheer up for the first time in months, as we packed for our summer holidays he hummed along and I gave Dom a small smile. We were both pleased that he had cheered up a bit, I guess amongst other things he just felt a bit homesick and maybe missed his mum and I could relate as I missed my family too.
We caught a flight home, it was a fourteen hour drive back to Albuquerque and I didn’t blame Lucas when he said he couldn’t be bothered for it. Our mums had paid for the flights for us because they were just as eager to have us home, on the way to the airport I got to thinking and I sincerely hoped that the next three years of college would be a lot less stressful than the first.
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