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Kihyun stared at the door. The slightly open door taunting him, urging him to enter. The door was still close to the door frame that the only thing he could see was the white wall of the closet.
Sighing, he takes a step back. This door lured him here wanting to know why Shownu comes here often. Before he used to want to barge in and find out immediately what he had. He thought, at first, that Shownu kept bodies in his room like in the short story he read in his English class, A Rose for Emily. Then he thought he was ridiculous for thinking such things.
If he did keep dead bodies in there the smell would be unbearable. He was definitely thinking crazy things. There wasn’t even a putrid smell.
And now he believes this room has to be related with the ultrasound he found on the picture book. But then why would he go back there when he for sure can go see his first child with the mother.
Kihyun took a step forward, his hand touching the door. His hand was cold from the touch, his forehead almost touching. The urge to open door invaded his vision. He envisioned himself inside there, shocked, his eyes unable to comprehend what he was seeing in there.
“I can’t do this, ” Kihyun said under his breath, turning around to walk back to his room, his eyes never looking at the door.
It was midday. Because of the pregnancy, he would wake up later than usual, nothing planned that would give him an excuse to wake up early. He was stuck in the house that waking up at one in the afternoon would not affect him, except the headaches that accompanied too much sleeping.
Despite his worry and his pensive curiosity, he was excited to see his friends Minhyuk and Hyungwon. He hadn’t seen them in a week and he was dying to see them. It was the first time in years that they had not seen each other in a week. Even though they all lived in separate buildings, they all went to each other’s places and spent hours and hours talking to each other.
The living room and kitchen were dirty. Dishes were on the sink and the two plates that Shownu had used for his breakfast laid there, a sign that he really needed to clean a soon as possible. Instead of going back to his room, he took a step forward and sat on the chair.
Breathing in and out, he touched his heart, the beating of his heart thumping so loud he could feel it all over his body. It was if someone had plugged in a speaker to his heart and was playing at the highest volume possible, wanting him to have a heart attack.
Everything would be fine, if Kihyun allowed himself to think positive thoughts. He didn’t have to always walk through the tunnel of misery and contemplation. And somehow, he always did. Moving in with Shownu had been a neutral thing. He didn’t think much about it. Moving in with Shownu was the practical thing to do. He was going to have three children in the span of six months and he needed all the help he could have; he actually needed money which Shownu has. He makes more money than he does so besides falling in love with Shownu, he had the option of extracting money from Shownu; which he would only use for his children, of course.
The falling for Shownu part. That statement bewildered him. He was falling in love with Shownu and he could begin to rip apart that of his brain that was hurting because of Shownu’s secret. This why it hurt so much. Shownu having a secret meant that he wasn’t completely a part of his life yet, especially now that Kihyun was verily discovering Shownu could potentially have another child besides the three Kihyun is carrying inside his womb.
What other secrets is he keeping! His brain screams as his heart moans with agony. His mind and brain argue, both equally fighting to be the one to be in most pain.
For sure his heart was the one winning. There was a hollow hole in his heart, creating an uncomfortable feeling that passed through his body and kept itself there, unable to move and settling in there, making itself comfortable.
As Kihyun picks up the two plates, he, for once for the past few days, ignores his heart, convincing his mind and heart to feel excited. They were having company!
The sound of the door awoke Kihyun from his nap. He had finished cleaning a few hours ago. He had mustered to take a shower and putting in nice clothes. He didn’t have to dress up nice for his friends-they had seen him in his worst before- but he didn’t want them to see him bleak and mopping around.
Slipping in his shoes, he yawned. For a few seconds he was confused as to where he was. Sleeping in too much disrupted his sleeping pattern and sense of the world clock of day and night. Kihyun pushed himself up from the bed and slowly wwalked up to the front door.
Fresh aroma of the wind filled his nostrils once he opened the door. The outside light blinded his eyesight. He needed to go out more. It didn’t take long before his eye sight regain its vision and focused on the two figures in front of him.
In front of him stood his two best friends. Hyungwon, without saying anything reached for a hug first before giving his children kisses.
“How are you feeling?” Minhyuk spoke, worry creasing through his eyebrows. A tight smile appeared on his face and it did not leave until they hugged, Kihyun explaining to him that he did not have to worry too for him.
“Are you sure you are okay?”
“Stop pestering him, Minhyuk. Let him at least sit down before he tells us. I bet you’re feet are hurting,” Hyungwon said, giving Minhyuk a look of disapproval.
“It’s fine. I haven’t been on my feet for a few hours so I need this,” Kihyun said, adding a little laugh. Minhyuk and Hyungwon always had different ways in approaching their affection toward him.
“You’re lying. Anyway, I’ve been meaning to see your house. It looks so much better that beaten up apartment you never wanted to give up.” Before anyone could say anything else, Hyungwon moved past them, whistling at the furniture that Shownu had picked way before he had moved in.
Minhyuk said nothing, clasping his hands around Kihyun’s shoulder. He was clearly annoyed with Hyungwon. Minhyuk was always serious while Hyungwon didn’t take things too seriously. Their different personalities were what Kihyun loved.
“One of these days, I am going to beat the shit out of Hyungwon, ” Minhyuk said with a neutral tone despite the eye rolling he was sporting.
They had began to walk when Kihyun halted, star struck upon hearing Minhyuk curse. Minhyuk rarely cursed. Hyungwon must of really pissed him off.
“You leave Hywungwon alone, Minhyuk, okay? He’s concern for me as you are. I want to spend time with you guys so please refrain from fighting.” Minhyuk froze at his words, a serious nod following after. Mihyuk was rarely given a lecture seeing as he was the one to give lectures and the one to explain if someone did something wrong.
“Promise me. Do tell me if you’re not feeling okay,” Minhyuk said, his eyebrows still knitted. Of course, Kihyun’s words wouldn’t comfort him. Minhyuk was a worrier. He worried for his friends, and he worried for them. If Kihyun didn’t worry, Minhyuk would do it for him.
“I promise,” Kihyun said, a shy smile stretching across his face, ” that I will tell you if anything happens.”
“Well you soften my nerves a little,”Minhyuk laughs, prompting to close the door. The breeze was coming in and the noise from outside had been ignored until they both noticed that they were still in front of the front door, with the door displayed wide open, giving an opportunity for cars passin by to see them and the anterior of his house.
“What are you doing?” Wasn’t Shownu supposed to be coming back with them? Shownu had told him that morning that he was bringing his friends to the house. Unless that statement meant that he would tell his friends to come to their house and he would be still working until late.
“Closing the door. Or are you planning on leaving the door open?”
“I meant, isn’t Shownu supposed to be coming with you guys? Is he stuck at work?”
“He said he was going on an errand and then come home. Why, is that bad?” Minhyuk’s eyes knitted down again.
Something inside twisted and his heart began to pounce again, that beat that meant he was going to overthink again. “No, just wondering.”
“Okay, then. He’ll for sure come home in a few. I’m pretty sure he’s not that worried since we’re here. Now show me your house, I want to see how boss’ personality is outside of work.”
“Totally different.” Kihyun’s mind was already going somewhere else. A place that he didn’t like going to.
Minhyuk began to talk about how weird it was to be in Shownu’s house and felt like an intruder. He also commented that he loved his interior design and that for once he had something in common with Shownu.
Despite hearing his voice, Kihyun was mentally somewhere else. His mind took the sonogram from his memory box and displayed it for his brain to stress over. It had been a few days since he found out about the sonogram.
Nights he spent worrying about another child possibly existing out there that isn’t a product of him and Shownu. Who was the woman? That embryo had been ten weeks. That embryo is probably one right this moment or much older. Who is he?
He tossed and tossed. His body hurt as he moved from side to side. Because of this pregnancy, his back hurt so much and no position in the bed ever helped him his back feel at ease. Sometimes he would sleep almost sitting up. And he would still feel restless.
“Is this your room?”
Kihyun blinked. Mentally shaking his head, his eyes focused on white. They were in front of the forbidding door.
“No. I don’t know why I dragged you here. This is my room, actually, ” Kihyun said, pulling Minhyuk to the opposite side, his eyes holding back tears.
Shit. He’s fucking up already. He was supposed to ease them into his situation.
He said nothing as he pulled him to his room. The door was already opened so he didn’t need to push anything. Instead, they stormed in. Luckily, Hyungwon was already inside so he didn’t have to speak.
“This house is my dream home! I think I’m gonna steal some furniture. My apartment needs some decoration, ” Hyungwon said, his body sprawled over the bed, one arm over his head. He looked comfortable and Kihyun envied him. He still needed a few months before his children are born. A few more months of back pain.
“What is going on? Don’t lie, now. Spill!” Minhyuk ignored Hyungwon and turned to look at Kihyun.
Their looks caused his cheeks to turn red. His cheeks warmed, his eyes lowered to the ground. Suddenly, he didn’t want to tell them anymore. This was too personal. Too embarrassing.
“There’s nothing to spill, ” Kihyun answered. He shouldn’t have called them. This was a mistake.
Hyungwon looked at them confused. Minhyuk frowned, his arms crossed. They knew he was lying. His behavior was different. He was silent. He always told them everything.
“I’m craving chips. I made Shownu buy chips for you guys. Let’s go to the living room.” Kihyun lightly pushed him Minhyuk out the door but failed.
“Kihyun, we’re serious. What’s going on? Shownu is not here, you can tell us what’s bothering you.” This time Hyungwon was the one to be serious. His hand was stretched out, waiting for his.
At this said, Kihyun sat and sank down. “Shownu has another child. My children share another sibling.”
“What?” they both said in unison.
Once he said his secret, his body began to shake, and no long after his tears came uncontrollably. He wept like he never wept before. That stupid sonogram invaded his vision. That is all he saw.
“I’m not understanding what you said. He has another child and he didn’t tell you about it? Is the child in his life?” Minhyuk was still standing up. He had his body facing the other direction and his arms were firm by his side.
Hyungwon was next to him, his body behind him and his shoulder holding his head.
“I don’t know. He hasn’t said anything about him having another child. I don’t even think he knows about my knowledge of his child.” While saying this, his voice became steady, only the vibrations that his body was making was real enough for him to feel it, but not show externally.
Minhyuk turns around. “What the fuck!”
Kihyun winced at the hard pronunciation Minhyuk had just said. That word again. It was hard to get used to.
All of their minds were blown. Kihyun could hear all their hearts pouncing hard against their chests. For a while they were silent. Minhyuk stood in the same position, unable to move, his lips parted in bewilderment. Hyungwon behind him shuffle a little on the bed, his hand pressing his skin against Kihyun’s chest.
“Are you sure he’s lying to you?” The voice belonged to Hyungwon. There was something in his voice that irked Kihyun. He had said the question as if there was nothin wrong with asking such question. Shownu was definitely lying. His heart tugged at him, pulled him to listen to his worries. They say that if you’re heart feels uneasy you should follow it.
Kihyun surpressed a gasp. “He is lying. I have proof.” His voice came out raspier than intended. He also didn’t intend to get up with such roughness, that even himself, when he stood to retract the sonogram from the bottom of the sock drower, surprised himself with disappointment.
Kihyun fishes the sonogram and turns around.” Here is your proof.”
Hyungwoon, astonished, crawled from the bed to snatched it from his fingers. His eyes went wide, staring at it as if it was the most provocative picture to have ever been seen.
“Let me see.” Mihyuk finally spoke after a few seconds of watching Hyungwon produce a myriad of emotions.
Having them see the sonogram brought a certain type of vulnerability. That vulnerability that talks about been lied to. Liars are good at keeping things without producing a hint of insecurity. Whether that lie was for their benefit or for their own protection. Kihyun didn’t know for which one. He wrapped himself with his arms, the openness the equivalent to nakedness.
“What do you want us to do?” Hyungwon said, his voice coming out normal and not filled with rage. Instead his eyes bore a calm Kihyun wished he had. He didn’t give him the sonogram back. What he gave him was his hand, pulling him to them. “Tell me and we will do it.”
By this time his sobs had subsided and his shoulders had the aftermath of overstressed muscles. “I don’t know.” Having said this aloud did not prepare him for what was to come afterwards.
He, of course wanted to confront Shownu. He wanted to know why Shownu didn’t tell him that their children have a step sibling. Why keep it a secret if you’re starting a life with someone knew?
Now bringing this up he didn’t know what he wanted to do. Well, more specifically, instruct his friends to help him find out the truth. What he has in mind is to find out if what he’s thinking is true than his question may only be answered by opening the door of the secret room.
Maybe his friends could him figure it out whether Shownu was lying or not. Obviously, the sonogram indicated that Shownu was for sure lying. This time, however, his friends would help him discover things he could not find by himself while staying confined to this bed.
He had decided.
He had to find out.
Kihyun began to speak when he heard a familiar sound. The sound of metal dragged to the side. Kihyun snatched the sonogram from Hyunwon. A car was nearby.
“Act normal.”
A/N:
Enjoy! Don’t know when I might post again. I have summer school starting on Monday but I’ll try to post soon.
Comments and votes are appreciated.
-Laterz Kelsi.
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