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-ASH-
I watch Emma as she’s moving her head to the loud music. She’s really pretty.
Lately, I have these strange feelings running through my head. I feel like kissing her. Like, … really kissing her. Not just pecking her lips. And it’s so strange because I haven’t been kissed a lot. Obviously.
I only had one first kiss when I was about sixteen. But I don’t feel like it counts, because the girl was like eleven and I only did that to see how I would feel. And I felt nothing exciting really.
But with Emma, it can be different. I guess. I think I’m ready to give another try with her.
I put some of her hair behind her ear with my fingers, making her stop moving. She looks at me surprised as I’m going lower to reach her height.
Her cheeks turn pink as I’m about to press my lips into hers for the first time. I can tell we both feel the electricity of the moment, but she pulls over quickly before I even kiss her properly.
“What?” I ask her confused. She’s looking at the floor.
“Sorry, I’m not feeling very well.” she says.
What the hell? Is she making fun of me? Doesn’t she see me like that? But, she has shown me signs that she might like me.
Maybe I was all wrong. Did I just embarrass myself? I just hope I didn’t ruin our friendship.
I try to ignore my confused thoughts for a moment and just concentrate on the music.
Mike was right. Their drummer sucks. He can’t even keep up with the rest of the band. I’m not saying that I play better, but I could. But being on the orphanage’s choir is not something to brag, so I’d better just keep it to myself.
Their music is cool though. It’s completely different to what I’ve ever listened to but I like it. Even though, I expected Michael to be in a more hard rock band to be honest.
When the concert finally comes to an end, the people start to leave and I see Emma walking away. I make my steps further to keep up with her. I want to know why she didn’t speak to me this whole time during the concert.
“Emma, where are you going? I thought that we were friends.” I tell her and grab her hand and turn her around to face me.
“Yeah, me too Ashton. What was that before?” she asks and blushes a little bit.
“I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I thought you liked me.” I say.
“I do. I think I like you. It was so sudden to me. Sorry.” she says and gives me a smile that makes her look a lot cuter than usual.
Woah there Ash.
Suddenly, her phone starts ringing, and when she checks the caller ID her smile fades.
“I’m sorry Ashton, but I need some privacy.” she says and starts walking away from me, to answer the phone.
“Sure,” I shout at her.
Is there something I should be worried about, or should I just let it go?
I start walking circles as I have no idea what to do to kill my time. Suddenly, loud noises take my attention and make me want to go closer.
I finally find myself being behind the stage, that the concert took place.
“We suck Lucas. Can’t you see it?” I can recognize Mike’s voice. He’s screaming.
I stand a few inches away from them, but the dark night hasn’t let them see me yet.
“You don’t have to shout Mike. Give him some time. He could make progress.” the other guy says. I can remember him being on stage singing. I assume he’s Lucas.
“Or we can just kick him out of the band and be a better band.” Mike says with an aggressive sarcasm.
“We can’t make quick decisions. We’re only in the beginning. Besides, how will we find a good drummer in such a little time?” Lucas says and I accidentally trip over a stupid rock.
They both turn at my sight.
“Who is it?” Lucas says and comes over to me.
“I’m s-sorry. I just got lost.” I lie as if it’s a piece of cake.
“Oh, it’s okay Luke. I know him. It’s Ashton, right?” Mike says and I simply nod.
There’s a small awkward silence between the three of us, until someone from afar breaks it with yelling something I cannot understand.
“Okay, I’m coming right now!” Lucas responds loudly and starts running to his direction.
“So Ashton,” Mike starts saying and coming closer to where I am standing, and runs his hand through his coloured hair.
“I’m glad you actually came.” he says.
“Of course. I was hoping if you would forgive me now.” I say and smile a little.
“Sure mate,” he says and chuckles. “So, how did you get here?” he asks.
“Uhm … I don’t know. I just heard some loud noises and I followed them, for no apparent reason.”
“You just like fights, don’t you?” he says with a wink.
That actually makes me feel slightly uncomfortable.
“No. I don’t. I don’t like fights. Don’t say that again. Ever!” I say with a louder tone on my voice. Mike’s eyes get widened now.
“Relax. I wouldn’t say that if I knew how you would react.” he says.
“Excuse me. Sometimes, I have no control of myself.” I say as I’m looking at the floor, trying to calm myself.
“Yeah. I’ve seen that.” he says and stares at me for a while. He looks at me from up and down with an irritating smirk on his lips.
“Now what are you looking at again?” I say louder again. He opens up his mouth but he doesn’t speak.
“Stop Mike, please. I don’t like it when people stare at me like that.” I say avoiding eye contact.
“Like what?” he asks, still with that smirk.
“Like that,” I shout, pushing him lightly on his chest and then finally leave.
I can’t even look back at him. I will lose control again. If only I could just stay calm and ask him what he wanted. He seems like a cool guy. Why do I always fuck things up? Why do I just walk away?
Will I ever change? Can Mike forgive me now, once again? So many things, that I’d love to change about me.
As I make further steps, I finally find Emma, standing with her back laying at a tree.
“Hey. Sorry for leaving you.” she says and looks at me with a frown.
“Don’t worry, it’s okay.” I say and take her hand as I remember we almost had a moment a while ago.
“Ashton, there’s something I need to tell you about.” she says, but I lean closer to her and have her head between my hands. Yes, just like all these stupid cliche’ movies. I’m not going to let anything prevent me from kissing her. I’m going lower to catch her lips.
“Seriously Ashton. I need to –“
But, I cut her of with a kiss. A really soft one, since I haven’t done this in a long time.
And I feel her kissing me back for like three seconds, until I hear an unfamiliar manly voice.
“Get your filthy lips off my girl!” someone yells and before I even pull over, he pushes me with such strength that I fall on the floor.
Emma starts screaming and tries to stop him, but he manages to grab me from my collar and hit my stomach. People around us are leaving terrified.
I can’t just stand there and let him hurting me.
I make my hand a fist and hit him on his nose, make him bleeding.
“Stop!” Emma continues shouting with tears in her eyes.
Why would she even kiss me back if she already has a fucking ‘boyfriend’?
I try to fight back but he’s a lot bigger than me, and perhaps older. He finally gives me a strong fist on my face which makes me spit blood from my mouth. But that isn’t enough for him. I’m already feeling a lot weaker and he hits me hard on my stomach again, making me fall on the floor.
I feel so numb. I don’t feel pain anymore.
Then, he grabs Emma’s hand with his bloody one and makes her go away with him, even though she tries to let go of him.
I watch them go away as I’m still lying on the floor, bleeding and half fainting.
::
-MIKE-
Why Ashton’s face is still running through my mind? He gets a little bit red on his cheeks when he gets mad, and he also has the deepest dimples when he smiles. But damn, why was I staring at him? Fucking hell.
I don’t even know him. Who the fuck does he think he is?
I hear the doorbell ringing. It’s Calvin’s house actually but he’s not here, neither his family at the moment, so I’ll get it.
One positive thing that happened, besides the band, is that I have a place to stay. But not for long. Cal suggested to stay with him and his parents for a while until I find a proper place.
I actually have to sleep on the couch, but who cares?
“Hello there, pretty.” I wink to the unknown brunette girl standing in front of me.
She giggles, “Hi. Where’s Calvin?”
“He’s not here. But I am.” I say with a grin.
She doesn’t seem offended so I guess I can go on. She steps in and makes herself comfortable on the couch. I sit next to her.
“I guess, I can just wait for him.”
Yeah right. I don’t think so honey. I wrap my hand around her, drawing circles in her back with my fingers.
She gets chills. “What are you doing?” she asks awkwardly.
“Keeping you company. You know I’m more fun than Calvin.” I say and lean closer to her but she slaps me hard.
“Stay away from me.” she says and slams the door after leaving.
I run my hand through my hair. Yeah, I guess the player-thing will never change.
//
that was a long enough chapter..voting would be cool, and i want to say good luck to whoever who has to put up with school again
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