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*****
*Jayden*
I watched as Marcus fell onto the floor unconscious and Bianca ran over to him, her face wet with concerned, terrified tears. My gaze slowly drifted from the pair to run up to Carrie, the pounding of my own heart made it impossible for me to listen to hers and I couldn’t tell if she was dead, but she had to be. There was blood leaking from her heart, staining her shirt and her head was hanging. I watched as a drop of blood soaked through the bottom of her shirt and dripped to the floor.
Hearing a sob from my left caused my head to snap towards Sean in shock. I had never seen him cry before. Trent and Zeke had the same reactions, just quieter. They were rapidly trying to cover their tears whereas Sean didn’t make a move to stop or hide his tears. Or he couldn’t. It seemed like his arms were limp at his sides.
It didn’t work…
I swallowed hard. I had been right about what it failing would feel like. It was like I was back in that field at Corey’s side again right after he got stabbed, it was like feeling and noticing the emptiness for the first time again.
I watched Katie pull Sean into a hug.
“I’m s-so sorry…” He whispered through his jerking sobs, the apology was aimed at Bianca.
“D-don’t be… He-he’s not dead…” Her reply was broken by more sobbing, “But it didn’t work… I don’t understand…” Bianca whispered staring at Marcus’s battered face as her fingers brushed his jaw gently.
I looked down letting out a breath I didn’t know had been stuck in my lungs. Despite how everything felt, I couldn’t cry anymore. I felt void… empty… disappointed… and I couldn’t react to anything. It did not even feel like being awake.
They tried… but he was gone… he’s gone. I inhaled sharply realising that my breathing had stopped again. It was something I had to actively remember to keep doing for the moment. It was alright. The twins didn’t know about it, which was all that mattered… They wouldn’t feel it all again, they would not be disappointed or broken. I shut my eyes wondering why no real reaction was coming from me, it hurt terribly but I couldn’t show that. It was like I wanted to cry, scream… I wanted to yell at Sean for telling me about this stupid plan in the first place… but I couldn’t.
I couldn’t do anything and because of that, it seemed like the right time to let go. There was nothing more we could do. I felt my eyes begin to sting as I focused on that undoubtable fact. He was gone. Letting it hurt more and completely was the only way it would feel slightly better later on… hopefully.
I began to close my eyes hoping to let the mark on my neck disappear but tensed as an arm dropped over my shoulder before it slid across my chest and the person pulled me against their chest. The movement immediately sparked familiar butterfly craziness in my stomach as sensations ran through my skin from where his was touching mine, it was accompanied by a sudden pulsing in my chest as my wolf stirred with a ridiculous amount of excitement that left me lightheaded. Blinking, I stared ahead shocked as I felt an intense, binding pull towards the person behind me.
No way…
“Babe,” Corey’s voice sounded casual as he nudged the side of my face with his leaving me completely stunned at the feeling of his warm cheek against mine, “This is by far the most depressing room I’ve ever been in…” I looked down as Sean’s cries instantly stopped and the room went silent. Hesitantly lifting my hand, I slowly moved it towards the arm around my neck and brushed my fingers against the skin trying to figure out if it was real. It felt that way, his skin was warm, the hair on his arms a little dishevelled. “Geez, Sean, I didn’t know you loved me that much, I would have mated with you if you told me sooner… But I would have left you for Trent or Zeke, Trent and Zeke? And then of course left them for Jay.” A strained chuckle released from my throat as Sean moved over to us just to punch Corey in his side. Trent chuckled doing the same to his other side and they began to laugh like nothing had happened. “Hey –” Corey turned me to face him before he wiped some tears away from my face. I hadn’t even realised I was crying. He smiled. “I’m right here, what you crying about?” he asked.
I shook my head; I had no idea why I was crying. I let out a sob and immediately stepped forward to crush into him, locking my arms around him tightly. I guess it was overwhelming. There had been so many emotions in the past few minutes, I was so dizzy. His pull had hit me pretty hard. So had his voice, and his touch. I let a chuckle out for no reason into his shoulder.
“I think this drove him crazy…” Jason whispered.
“I think so.” Zeke.
“Shut up.” Corey chuckled. Wait. I wiped my tears quickly and he looked at me wide-eyed. “Okay, maybe you guys are right.”
“Shut up –” I gave a throaty chuckle that sounded more like a sob as I grabbed his face and kissed him. I didn’t really care that they were watching. I had missed it so much. Him, his lips, feeling his skin. Everything.
I stopped as I heard a grunt and turned to see Marcus roll onto his side before Bianca helped him sit up. His face had already healed. “I guess I’m stronger than I thought.” He looked at Sean.
“I told you,” Sean responded with a smug smirk.
Marcus just chuckled in response as he rolled his eyes. “Yeah, but you doubted it too.”
“Come back –” I turned to Corey confused when he spoke but as soon as I was facing him he kissed me again.
I gave a choked chuckle as laughter broke from around us as I kissed him back.
—–
*A few days later*
It was about seven in the morning as I tugged on a jacket before looking back over at the bed. On it lay Corey and our children, all soundly asleep. I bit my lip, the scene was comforting and worrying at the same time. The kids were still traumatised about everything that had happened and Corey and I figured that it was best to have them talk to someone. They panicked when either of us was out of their sight for too long and had spent the last few nights in our room. My eyes moved to Corey who had his arms stretched around Tamia and Eli as he slept and for a second I began to feel my stomach twist. He looked…
I focused my ears on the sound in the room before specifically narrowing-in on Corey. His breathing was fine. He was okay.
I let out a soft breath of relief and reached to zip my jacket shut but paused looking over at my mate. It was hard enough to climb out of bed without waking him, the zipping would undoubtedly wake him so I decided against it and began to turn to the door but heard a soft, sleepy voice.
“Jay…” I turned to look back at Corey as he whispered, “Where are you going?” his sleep-hazed squinted eyes ran over at me.
I smiled walking up to the bed before planting a quick hiss on his temple.
“Taking a walk, I’ll be fine.” I smiled. He studied at me for a second before nodding.
“Take your phone,” I assured him that I already had that on me and began to leave.
It was refreshing not to have him overly worried about my stepping out of the house by myself, though clearly still concerned, but that was okay because I was concerned about how he was whenever he went to work as well. It was clear that he was trying not to be as afraid of my just disappearing, I guessed that Mike and my father’s deaths helped with that because people could not be brought back more than once so they were really never going to return.
There were a few people in the Inferno packhouse that I ran into before making it outside. It was still quite early but the frosty air was refreshing as I took a deep breath before heading into my car. The drive into the city was about thirty minutes and then five more to reach the cemetery. It was empty, as expected on a cold morning but I did not mind and parked before stepping out.
I walked up to the grave slowly being careful to avoid all the others before pausing once my feet were right beside the somewhat raised soil of a clearly unattended gravesite. It looked like no one had been there since they were buried, well, basically no one had been there when they were buried.
Bending my knees, I leaned down to have a closer look at the grave and gave an amused breath through my nose, only feeling slightly bad about it. They had been buried for a while but there was not a single flower on the grave. There were already weeds growing which made it clearer that no one had bothered with the grave since it was first carelessly covered. I reached to pick up some of the sand and let it fall through my fingers back onto the ground while feeling a small smile play on my lips.
It was weird, the first time they died I was relieved but it never really felt real, now I just wanted to laugh.
It would be interesting if creatures that had passed could watch the living, I was sure they would be watching me absolutely pissed. That thought made me chuckle to myself. It was funny imagining the pair still angry at me, probably blaming me for their deaths when they started everything that led up to it. They could have been brought back, minded their own business and they would have still been alive with no one that used to know them having a clue that they were back. I did not actually mind how things played out though, it was funny to think that I had outlived them twice despite all their threats and insults.
I didn’t think I was very strong, but I was starting to understand that I was pretty strong. It may not have been physical strength, but I was strong enough to survive until reinforcements showed up and they always would… because unlike the men currently buried somewhere beneath my feet, I actually did have people who cared about me. Even when I did not think that. Sometimes strength just meant surviving until being able to get or ask for help from other people.
Staring at the grave, I felt pretty proud of myself and the people I had around me. I also felt sorry for a younger me that thought I was alone and blamed himself for everything the disgusting ‘people’ beneath me had done. It wasn’t my fault. Though, how I lived from that point on was my responsibility and I wasn’t going to keep letting the past haunt me anymore. I swallowed before letting out a deep breath that felt like something I had been holding in for a long, long time before looking at the sky.
It was a nice day, the sun was beginning to come out and I liked the cooler weather. It did not look like rain so a picnic seemed like a good idea. I decided to call Corey while standing up and looked around the empty graveyard as the call rang. Usually, I would have felt uneasy, not because of the thought of anyone lurking or waiting to attack, but I just always felt uneasy and tense, but at the moment I was very relaxed.
“Babe.” Corey’s voice spoke into my ear when he answered, “You on your way back? I’m helping your mom and some of the others make breakfast for everyone. What do you want?”
“I was thinking we could eat at the park with the kids, so anything but pack it up?” I suggested.
“Mmm… You’re in a good mood.”
“Yup.” I smiled hearing him chuckle.
“It does seem pretty nice outside. Okay, I’ll get things ready. You feel far away.”
“I’m at the graveyard.” There was silence from Corey before his voice spoke in soft concern.
“Babe, why…?”
“Just wanted to pay my respects.” I tried not to laugh while staring down at the grave.
“Do we need someone to clean up the grave?” He asked sounding much less concerned than he had seconds ago.
“You really think I’d make a mess?” My brows furrowed.
“Right,” he laughed. We knew who the messy one was.
I chuckled, “I’ll see you in about half an hour…” My voice drifted for a moment as I wondered whether to end the call as we always did as my mind moved to the conversation we had right after he appeared at the house Mike and my father had held me at. We had not gotten back to that, but none of what had been said eluded to my feelings towards him having changed, they had not. “I love you.” There was a pause for a few seconds before I heard Corey’s throat clear.
“I love you too, Babe. Drive safely.” He said.
I smiled hanging up before backing away from the grave.
*****
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