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๐
Was it casual
ft. cat balls
” ์ง๊ธ ๋ ๊ฐ ๊ธธ์ ์์ ๋ณ “
–
The main lights dimmed as the crowds sitting along the audience’s seats began to shush down. Every room in Teyvat was massive considering there were seven different departments, each almost considered their own school. And mass gathering spaces like these almost reminded visitors of an actual performance auditorium.
“Welcome, ladies and gentlemen!”
On cue, the stage lights clicked on and drowned the narrator in the blinding white streams that made the crowds momentarily squint. “I’m honoured everyone was able to join us today. My name is Furina, and I’ll be your narrator through this tale.” The snowy haired student took a moment to look around while the dark audience erupted in polite claps. Most were just parents there to see their children perform or students’ friends, but there was a good handful of people who came to visit the school play like an actual performance, knowing their quality each year. The extra eyes only weighed the director’s footsteps on the stage.
Behind the maroon curtains, students were busily making final preparations for their appearances beneath the spotlight. Once the curtains unveiled, there was a large amount of stage for props and actors ready to step out. And on either sides, there were doors that led to preparation rooms where crew members adjusted extra matters such as sound tracks and actors finished with their roles rested. On one side, the decoy Ballerina was present. On the other side, the backup Wooden soldier was watching the live happening on the main stage through the tv hung on the wall.
Itto, playing the jack-in-the-box, (recommended by the whole theatre team due to his stature and figure, but doubted slightly by the director at first) was currently draining the snack bowl in the east backstage room where the other Ballerina was temporarily housed in. From what she had rehearsed with the kids, she still had at least two and a half hours left until she had to make an appearance. After all, she was just the backup in the epilogue.
The exact same had been told to the replacement Wooden Soldier with roles reversed, who was resting blissfully unaware and a storm brewing in his heart by the west backstages.
Furina had another few lines of dramatically gesturing around the stage and getting the audience into the mood before the first act officially started. Y/n was busy fawning over the detailing of the costumes the Wax Swans were wearing, wishing them good luck as they scurried out to wait behind the curtains for their entrance. The teacher mentally sighed in relief at the clothes she was wearing, not much different from a regular attire other than the small similarities to the Paper Ballerina’s original costume. She wasn’t playing the actual Ballerina, but her reincarnation. The kids surely got creative with the story.
But then again.. Was the epilogue really that necessary? It seemed like a scene in a modern shoujo adaptation film rather than an old classic. Well, the tale had thousands of different adaptations on its own.
Across the doors, Scaramouche leaned against the back of the couch with a horrifying expression shadowed over his face. The students also present in the room were dead silent as though this was one of his classes. Out of all days, why did he have to be in this sour of a mood?? Although half of the room sulked over the fact they were trapped in this room (cage), one of them was mind you, very deep in existential crises. He barely had twenty four hours to process the revolutionary finding that slapped into his mind last night.
He loved that thing who was probably cheering from the crowds as she said she would.
Love, don’t be ridicuโ
Actually, denying it would be more energy depleting by this point.
One unread message
He stared at the contact name and caved in.
–
Y/n
Y/n
are yoy in the auditorium??
delivered 5 : 07 PM
You
yeah
you?
read 5 : 07 PM
Y/n
yep
i met a few friends back from high
school so we sat together
read 5 : 08 PM
You
get off your fat phone the kids
are coming into stage
read 5 : 08 PM
Y/n
Image failed to load
read 5 : 08 PM
You
I do not want to see whatever
that was supposed to be.
read 5 : 08 PM
Y/n
ugh this school needs wifi investment
anyways its this cat toy thing i saw
yesterday
read 5 : 09 PM
You
the rat has enough toys as it is
hes too spoiled
read 5 : 09 PM
Y/n
you call my baby anything but his
name
and yeah thanks to someone who always
disappears off to the cat supply section
whenevrer we go grocery shopping and
fills half the cart
but its not toy balls
like
literal cat balls
read 5 : 09 PM
You
?
read 5 : 10 PM
Y/n
FINALLY LOADED
just look at it
dont you feel bad for kabu as a fellow
man for taking his balls away last
week
read 5 : 10 PM
You
…..
Y/n.
I’m freezing your card if that ever
darkens the doorstep.
read 5 : 11 PM
Y/n
Glowing balls
think about it scara
everytime kabu walks itll jiggle
jiggle
delivered 5 : 11 PM
You can no longer message this user
find out why
Y/n
DID YOU JUST BLOCK ME
Im sorry unblock meplspls
I promise to be a financially
responsible adult from now on
–
A ridiculed snort exhaled through his nose, tapping the red unblock button shortly after to see her messages flooding in.
Elegant piano tunes and high pitched flutes joined in from the concert band as the show began. Scaramouche raised his head and crooned it to the television hung on the wall nearby. Female students in the dance club stepped out and matched the beat of the music. Bluish white fabrics bobbing with jumps and twirls, the audience watched in enchantment as the paper ballerina emerged. Everyone who came by said something along the lines of the quality exceeding that of a bunch of ragtag teenagers.
But after this year’s whole replacement drama, Scaramouche forever held a grudge against theatre kids. Still, the thought of her expression upon seeing him suddenly appear on the stage would be a sight to see. Maybe that part made this ridiculous situation worth it.
โ
Act I;
The Paper Ballerina’s wishes
A long, long time ago, there was a beautiful collection of toys in a toy shop.
The steadfast tin soldiers, braver than a bear with the chivalry of the finest knight. They protected the other toys and retained order each day. Imported porcelain dolls that would invite all the stuffed animals of the shop to their nightly tea parties, clinking tiny glass cups and whispering cheekily.ย Only when the toy store owner looked outside the window and jumped at the time to pick his keys and leave, life swarmed the shop.
And amidst the glittering wax swans carved only from the most skilled sculptor, the toy shop’s most delicate treasure lay asleep in the dollhouse. Only when the cuckoo clock called out midnight, the Paper Ballerina would emerge from the shadows cast by moonlight.
Once the first chunk of narrative ended, the student playing the ballerina emerged into the stage. Originally, there were talks about Fischl being the Ballerina, but instead a conveniently h/c haired actor was chosen a little later. The music grew more apparent after the director finished her sentence, allowing their audience to admire the dancers. Y/n leaned her face into her palm with eyes glued to the screen. Itto waved her a goodbye when one of the backstage staff came to grab him out.
For a short moment, he saw a glimpse of an expression he had yet to see on the cheery teacher’s face. She switched up within a heartbeat and flashed him a smile. “Break a leg out there, jack in the box!” She raised her thumb up in encouragement.
Soon, it was just herself left to her thoughts. Most characters had at least a glimpse of stage time by the beginning for the introductions, so only the backup remained in the room for now.
…But in the harmonious shop that only awoke at night, the peaceful music boxes came to a halt.
The Jack-in-the-box had arrived in the toy store, hidden in the colourful box that attracted many other toys once the first night fell. One of the many brave tin soldiers fearlessly went up to the newcomer once the shop owner closed the door and locked the entrance.
Everyone watched in anticipation as the handle crackled and began to turn clockwise direction. Soon, the lid of the box flipped open. Halting their performance, the carrousel riding fairy figures eagerly turned to the scene. Even the ongoing tea party on top of the shelf was temporarily paused.
The music soon came to a dramatic halt. Snorting, Y/n prepared herself for the upcoming scene. A few young children in the audience screeched and handfuls of unprepared watchers jumped when Itto emerged from the box and snatched up the student playing tin soldier number… 36? Lights were adjusted so that only the black silhouettes could be seen, and it looked like the jack-in-the-box was cruelly devouring the soldier to the audience. This scene had to be repeated a comical amount of times during rehearsals because everyone would burst out laughing.
As the ever-brave soldier was devoured by the jack-in-the-box, the toy store broke into havoc. The tin figure’s comrades didn’t hesitate to hurriedly climb up onto the desk to avenge their comrade, but it was of no use. Not even their mighty wooden swords did much against the large and heavy opponent. One by one, the courageous tin soldiers dented and cracked upon impact against the cold ground below, or ended like their first liege.
Terrified screeches of the porcelain dolls watching the scene, the dancing wax swans quickly fleeing the scene. It was only when there was only a dozen or so soldiers left to fight, damaged from the fiery battle and discouraged from their mighty enemy. Finally, the jack-in-the-box began to speak.
“I have heard that here resides a Ballerina, most fairer than any sculpture.” He exclaimed, surveying the shop. His eyes finally landed on the Paper Ballerina, trembling behind a painted vase of flowers made from strings. “If I can have the Ballerina, I shall no longer devour or harm any of the toys in the shop.”
The Ballerina was shaking in fear, her thin paper exterior being meant for anything but fighting. As the other toys murmured in both debate and pity, she desperately looked around for anyone that could defend her. Even the steadfast guards that defended peace in the shop were worn and defeated.
Silently, she continued dancing in the moonlit stage. She did not cry, for her tears would soak up and rip her figure whole.
“Ballerina! What will you do?” One of the wax swans worriedly chimed in, huddled together by the shadows of the dollhouse in fear for their friend. The dancer did not respond, never laying eyes upon the crowd expectantly boring their eyes into her twirling figure. Afraid that if she ever stopped dancing, that would be the day it all came to an end.
The doll council gathered and discussed with one another.
“This is for the better of everyone!” One stated. Shaking her head, the blonde parian doll sobbed tears of crystals. “How could everyone be so heartless?? Ballerina hasn’t done anything wrong!” She cried out. The plush bear with a missing button thought solemnly for a long, long time.
Y/n choked a laugh, noticing how Itto lost hold of the lid on the box prop and it fell on top of a toy soldier lying dead on the ground. She leaned her cheek into her palm with a smile. Despite already knowing how the story flowed, it felt different watching as a part of the audience instead of feeling the scenes on stage. So far, it was going smoothly. The wooden soldier wouldn’t show up until the end scene of the first act, since this part was mostly about the Ballerina.
Most parts after this were just the Ballerina’s interactions with the other cast and the jack-in-the-box and the toy councils, which wasn’t included in the original version. Nevertheless, the teacher was impressed by the thought behind it despite being a little disappointed that the story didn’t really seem like the one she knew anymore. Meanwhile someone else was grumbling and mumbling about how they ruined a classic art.
Come to think of it, he had been invading most of her thoughts these days. Mixing navy blue paint? Two tones off to someone’s. Drinking tea? Someone would contort his face and ask why she dunked five cubes or sugar into it. Without even noticing, their schedules and patterns melted into each other during their rather short stay together. Dinner was sat at the table together with the television playing in the background as an excuse, talking about mindless snippets of their thoughts. Barging into one another’s room complaining about their belongings going missing wasn’t considered boundary crossing or all that inappropriate anymore. Discussions about movie endings after a film.
This was casual, right?
But was it casual when he held her against his chest, that was beating almost as heretically as hers when she was crumpling at her doorstep? Was it superficial when she found him melting away into his bed and thoughts, pulling him up from the room’s shadows swallowing him whole?
What even were they?
Slapping her hands against her cheeks, the art teacher shook her head rapidly as if it would do much to shake off the thoughts. He was just a coworker. Who also happened to be a… Roommate. And maybe a friend. Friends had meals at home with each other and hugged, right?? That sounded like the most logical explanation right now. But when she dug her mind around for memories of having episodes near any of her other friends, no one came to conclusion.
Without even much thought, their expressions were already being sketched in the artist’s head. Wide-eyed, mouth gaped like a fish as though they saw something they shouldn’t. A part that shouldn’t be a part of the cheery person they knew and loved. That wasn’t the person they put their trust in and made the effort to know. Naturally, they would stumble and take a step back. One thing funny about eyes, is that one can choose what they see or not. If they don’t choose to see and accept it, its existence is as good as nothing to them.
So on some days, she was nothing.
But with him, she was something every waking moment.
Whether that be an unbearable roommate or an out of character coworker, he always looked at her like she was something. She was never not something he wished to see, seeing herself in the reflection of his eyes whenever they would lock visions.
The mere thought of it made her chest tighten. Whatever this was, this was most definitely not friendship or coworker relationship.
Even if that may be the case, she didn’t want to confront the deal that would only mess up her already tangled thread of thoughts even more. Having any sort of feelings towards people was exhausting. Whether it be being mad or holding a grudge, that all took effort and energy. Seeing everyone in neutral-positive light made things much more easier. That way, she wouldn’t have to replay her stolen adolescence again.
Bright colours and childish habits, maybe it was pettiness of her showing these behaviours at this age. But this was never a part of any other point in her life. So she painted her walls over and over again in different shades, hanging decorations in every empty corner, hoping to draw out the voids that would appear and suck her in. Then she slapped on colourful stickers on everything she owned, as if that would cover over her vision and everything she saw in everyday objects. Thinking it would rinse out the shadows that crawled over her shoulders, she splattered her whole being in colours of all shades. But the lighter the colours got, the more evident their shadows became.
Likes and dislikes. Comfort and discomfort. Y/n knew and acknowledged such things that entered those boundaries. She knew the kind of people she liked and the type of fabric that she felt comfortable in. Although, feeling them was an another deal. The excruciating twist of devastation and the muddling sadness, she felt a variety of emotions overtime like many other people.
Y/n watched those around her fall in love left and right. Watching as their eyes lighting up at the mere thought of their loved ones, reactions differing. For couples, they would get all jittery and explode in pink hues. Mothers would wear proud expressions before going off for what seemed like hours about their children’s’ achievements. How could people surrender themselves to one another so wholeheartedly, baring their entire beings with such unwavering trust? Expressions melting into softened smiles just at the mention. Liking someone was one thing, but the ability cherish someone so deeply, to favour someone else’s happiness before your own, was a skill she deemed herself of lacking.
While everyone was falling in love, she was slowly falling behind.
The epitome of selfishness. Having yet to learn to love someone without reason at this age, nor could even hold onto the simple responsibility of tangling through her own feelings.
Somewhere inside, she wanted that too.
Someone to hold her wordlessly when she had enough of today. Someone who wouldn’t frown and walk the other way once she unzipped ms. L/n off and laid bare before them. Someone she was something to.
However, would she be the same to them?
Before she knew it, some of the actors were coning back into the waiting rooms. Waving lazily, she greeted them from the couch. “You guys were killing it up there. Even better than rehearsals!”
She recognized one of the students as the unfortunate victim from Itto’s box lid fumble earlier. They were moaning and complaining about their sore nose bridge to their friends. Most of the students flushed onto the couch or sat around by the chairs in their groups, still hyped up from the spotlight adrenaline.ย
“Look, the first act is almost ending.” One of the wax swan players pointed at the screen on the wall. Y/n’s eyes almost popped out. It’s been that long since she zoned out??? And when she did switch her attention back onto the television, the first chapter was indeed coming to an end.
Spinning and spinning, the Ballerina never once opened her eyes before the world that caved down on her. And when she did, she woefully let herself be kissed by the moonlight flooding through the window.
“For what is this beautiful shell if even a single tear would shred it apart?” She finally placed both feet on the ground and walked closer to the glass that separated her from the outside world. Smoothing out the wrinkles on her paper dress, the Ballerina woefully gazed back at her reflection. “Oh, my dearest moon….”
Only the moon heard her whisper that night.
“My most precious wish, is that I could encounter one with a fiery heart that would swallow us whole from this world. A paper body like mine or a hard tin armour, please send one with the purest heart of all.”
Or at least, she thought.
โ
And showing a scene of the Wooden Soldier peeking up from a prop, the curtains drew to conclude the first act. As the students came into the waiting room for the scene break, the lingering silence shattered.
“Ms. L/n.. Are you crying?”
“..Eh?” The teacher blinked and finally realized that her eyes glazed over with a layer of liquid.
“Yeah, at the thought of all the unhanded assignments from you. Your mixed media project is three weeks past due kiddo! Get back to work!!”
The room burst to laughter, and the real actor among them succeeded in clowning with the audience once more.
โโ
A/n we’re almost there people we can do it
There was gonna be a plot ab yns mom popping in and making the angst tag real but im reconsidering with how long this story already is ๐คฆโโ๏ธ either way im a slowburner so im putting more emphasis on their character dev and dynamics as of now so the plots gonna be on hold for a bit
save me from triangles
Theyre on the walls theyre on my toes theyre in my screen THEYRE IN ME
the world is a lie. It was all js triangles all along.
Fanart by frfruzan
the realest thing ive seen today dw its gonna be canon soon
VERY LAZILY PROOFREAD pls yell al me for grammer shit asap
3547 words
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