Under the Same Sky [BOYXBOY] - Chapter 75

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Jayden could hear the sound of his parents arguing downstairs.

They had been arguing quite a lot lately ever since he came out to them a few months ago and he had learned to tune them out. This time, however, the angry voices were too loud in volume for him to ignore.

A few minutes later, he could hear the sound of footsteps making their way toward his room. The door opened and his father’s face came through.

‘Get ready, we are going out,’ his father stated shortly.

‘Where are we going?’

Jayden could tell his father was unhappy with the question. Ever since he found out that Jayden was gay, he had hated being in the same room with him, much less speaking with him.

He saw the tic begin to form in his father’s jaw and he reconciled himself to the fact that he wasn’t going to get an answer, but to his surprise, his father replied.

‘We are going to church.’

‘Why?’ Jayden shot back before he could think better of it. The tic in his father’s jaw began to work more furiously and he knew that his father was fed up with his questions.

‘Just get ready,’ his father ordered before turning to leave.

‘No.’

His father paused and turned around as if he couldn’t believe his ears. Jayden was just as surprised as him and was surprised even further by the sudden burst of defiance he found.

‘I’m not going,’ he stated firmly.

His father’s expression was unreadable. ‘What did you say?’

A bolt of fear tore through Jayden, but he staunchly held his ground. ‘I’m not going, and you can’t make me.’

That was the wrong thing to say, for the instant his father heard those words, his unreadable expression blazed with cold fury.

‘Can’t I?’ he uttered before reaching over to grab Jayden by his hair.

‘What are you doing? Let me go!’ Jayden shouted out as his father proceeded to drag him by the roots of his hair out of his room. He felt his eyes begin to sting as his scalp burned with the force of the pull.

His father ignored his flailing hands and tightened his fingers even further as they moved through the expansive corridors of the manor.

Jayden’s body began to shiver with coldness as his skin was dragged mercilessly over the cold tiles. He was still in his underwear because his father hadn’t even let him change, and as he felt the servants’ surprised eyes on his half-naked form, he felt his skin begin to prickle with shame.

‘Dad, please,’ he begged. ‘You’re hurting me.’

‘Good,’ his father stated. ‘That would teach you to never talk back to me.’

The tears were falling freely down Jayden’s face now and he could no longer tell if they were because of the pain, the embarrassment, or the shock.

He soon heard his mother’s surprised voice as they entered the entrance hall.

‘Jayden? Roger! What are you doing? Roger!’

His father ignored the outraged cries of his wife and turned to the shocked servant by the door.

‘Tell the chauffeur to bring the car around.’

The servant looked scared out of his wits as he nodded dumbly and ran off. Jayden’s father dragged him out of the manor, and he soon felt the warm heat of the sun hitting his skin.

‘Mum?’ he cried out weakly.

‘Roger, stop this at once!’ his mother’s shrill voice rang through the air. ‘What are you doing? Let him go!’

‘Doing what you failed to do. I am teaching him a lesson.’

‘In public?’ his mother asked incredulously. ‘Are you out of your mind? What sort of lesson is this?’

‘One he needs to learn.’

The car finally pulled up and the chauffeur got out unsurely to hold the door open for his father.

‘Open the trunk.’

The chauffeur was taken aback. ‘S… Sir?’

‘Open the trunk.’

‘I… but…’

His father fixed with him with a steady look. ‘Do you want to keep your job?’

‘But sir, your son…’

His father’s gaze turned deadly. ‘Are you questioning my order?’

The chauffeur shut his mouth and rushed to open the trunk, his eyes avoiding Jayden’s as they moved past him.

His father wordlessly picked him up and threw him violently into the trunk, causing him to hit his head. He struggled to get up, but the hood of the trunk immediately closed in above his head with a sharp click.

As his eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness, he could hear the faint voices of his parents as the fought furiously just outside.

‘Have you gone crazy?’

‘If trying to fix our son makes me crazy, then yes, I have gone crazy.’

‘I want him to get better as well, but this is not the way!’

‘I wouldn’t have to do this if it wasn’t for you!’

‘Me?’ his mother’s voice turned incredulous. ‘You are blaming me? If anything, this is your fault! I’m barely home; you were the one who spent the most time with him. Maybe if you behaved like his father instead of acting like his best friend, he wouldn’t be this way.’

‘And maybe if you were home instead of working all the time then he would know what female affection was instead of seeking it out from men!’

‘If I am so cold and unloving, why did you marry me in the first place!’

‘Trust me, I am asking myself the same question.’

Jayden soon heard his father’s footsteps walking away. He didn’t hear his mother speak, but he knew that those last words tore into her like a dagger.

He curled himself into a ball in the small dark space as tears filled his vision again.

It was all his fault.

His world was torn apart because of him.

His family was broken because of him.

His parents were fighting because of him.

Why did he have to be so different? Why couldn’t he be normal?

‘Jayden?’ He heard his mother call out to him.

‘Jayden, can you hear me? Are you alright?’

He curled deeper into himself and tried to block out her voice.

‘Jayden.’

‘Jayden.’

‘Jayden!’

‘Jayden, wake up! You’re having a bad dream.’

Jayden’s eyes flew open as he shot up suddenly. His breathing was ragged as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He blinked slowly and looked around him, and as his eyes adjusted to the faint light, Samuel’s worried face slowly came into focus before him.

He closed his eyes tiredly and laid back down. ‘I’m sorry for waking you up again,’ he whispered softly.

Samuel’s voice was gentle. ‘Don’t apologize. It’s you I’m worried about. Sleep can wait.’

‘Don’t worry about me. I’m fine.’

Samuel hesitated. ‘Are you, though?’

Jayden opened his eyes to stare at him. ‘What do you mean?’

Samuel bit his lips hesitantly, wondering how best to proceed. ‘It’s just… you’ve been having a lot of bad dreams lately. It started when we got back home for spring break, and thinking about it, you’ve been a bit out of sorts since the Alumni Ball.’

Jayden turned his eyes away. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you, but I really am alright.’

‘Stop apologizing,’ Samuel scolded gently. ‘I’m your boyfriend; it’s part of my job to worry about you.’

‘There is nothing to worry about.’

Samuel let out a frustrated sigh. ‘Stop that. What have I told you about gaslighting? I’ve been trying to give you your space, hoping that whatever it is, when you’re ready, you would talk to me about it, but knowing you, if I don’t force it out, you’ll let it rot you from the inside until you take it to your grave. Now stop being stubborn and talk to me… please.’

Jayden scowled stubbornly at his boyfriend, but after taking in his pleading look and the worry swimming in his eyes, he finally relented.

‘Fine,’ he muttered sullenly, sitting back up.

Samuel beamed happily at him and positioned himself to sit next to him on the bed.

Jayden looked down at his hands, and after a while, he whispered softly. ‘I was disowned.’

Samuel thought he couldn’t be hearing it right. ‘What?’

‘My father finally disowned me. He abandoned me the night of the ball.’ He let out a humourless laugh. ‘Both my parents are alive, yet I am officially an orphan. Amusing, isn’t it?’

Samuel wasn’t smiling. ‘No. No, it’s not.’

Jayden shook his head to himself. ‘It’s pathetic. After everything I went through when I came out to them, I made myself strong so they can never hurt me again. I took martial arts classes so I would never be anyone’s ragdoll again. I cut off all emotional ties to him in my heart so his betrayal would never hurt me again. Yet look at me, despite everything I did, he is still able to hurt me. It’s pathetic. I am pathetic and weak.’

Samuel took his hands into his own. ‘I don’t think you are pathetic and you are certainly not weak. You are the strongest person I know.’

Jayden scoffed at that. ‘You must not know a lot of people then.’

‘We both know that’s not true.’

Jayden took his hands away. ‘It doesn’t matter anyway.’

Samuel grabbed his hands back. ‘Yes, it does. It’s natural to feel hurt over the fact that your father no longer wants you. No matter how shitty and despicable he is, he is still your father. What’s unnatural is the way he is treating you, not your reaction.’

‘But I hate how I am reacting to it. I don’t want to react at all. It makes me weak.’

Samuel stared at him. ‘Do you want to be like Azrael?’

Jayden’s nose immediately wrinkled in disgust. ‘Certainly not.’

‘He’s a cold, emotionless machine, and only people like that won’t react to something like this. Having emotions doesn’t make you weak; it makes you human. I’m not going to lie to you; sometimes feeling things suck. It sucks like hell but that just makes the good moments happier and sweeter. Being unable to feel things is a sad and lonely existence I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.

‘Why do you think Azrael was so obsessed with us? Why he loves “playing” with people? He thinks he does it because of his sick amusement, but the sad reality is that the only way he can experience human emotions is by living through other people.’

The final piece of the puzzle suddenly clicked in place, and Jayden realized with a start that Samuel was right. All this time, he had been trying to figure out the enigma that was Azrael and that had been the answer all along.

If he was being honest, he was feeling more than a little miffed that he hadn’t been the one to figure it out.

‘Sometimes I forget just how good you are at understanding people,’ he muttered grudgingly. Another puzzle clicked into place and he sat up straighter. ‘Hold on, is that why you wanted to be his friend? You felt sorry for him?’

Samuel blinked at him. ‘Wasn’t that obvious?’

‘We really need to work on that saviour complex of yours.’

Samuel glared at him. ‘It’s called basic human decency not having a saviour complex.’

Jayden shook his head. ‘Not in your case. You take it too far sometimes. Let’s say you see a person about to be gouged to death by a herd of rampaging rhinoceros; I know for a fact you would jump in to save them without any regard for your own safety.’

Samuel found he couldn’t deny that. ‘So, what if I would?’ he shot back defiantly. ‘There’s nothing wrong with trying to help people.’

‘See! This is what I’m talking about!’ Jayden snapped, his frustration suddenly erupting and causing angry tears to come into his eyes. ‘In your quest to save the world, O glorious knight, do you ever stop to think about the people you would leave behind? What about me? The world is not the only one that needs you. I need you too.’

Samuel had to admit; he had never thought about that before. ‘Hey, hey,’ he said soothingly, trying to calm his visibly upset boyfriend. ‘You’re right. Look at me.’ He grabbed Jayden’s face and forced him to look into his eyes. ‘Listen to me. No matter how bad my “saviour complex” gets, you would always be the first person I want to save. I can’t promise not to try and help people I meet, but I can promise never to put anyone above my safety.’

‘You tend to rush into these situations without thinking,’ Jayden muttered.

‘Then you’re going to stop me. If I’m ever getting too deep, just say “rampaging rhinos” and I would remember my promise. Deal?’

Jayden’s lips lifted slightly in a small smile. ‘Deal.’

‘And about what happened with your father, I can’t give you back the family you lost, but I can be the family you need. If he wants you gone then fine, we will go somewhere he cannot hurt you ever again.’

Jayden blinked at him in surprise. ‘You would come with me?’

Samuel looked at him as if he thought that was a very stupid question. ‘Where else would I go?’

‘But your family…’

‘You are my family.’ He shrugged. ‘They can always visit, and if they don’t want to… well, as long as I have you with me, I would be fine. You’re all the family I need.’

Jayden’s shoulders suddenly felt lighter. All this time, he had been worried about leaving Samuel behind, and now he realized he wouldn’t have to. Looking into Samuel’s face now, he knew with startling clarity that no matter what, he was stuck with this person for the rest of their lives.

His smile widened at the thought. He could live with that.

‘Thank you,’ he said, and he meant it.

Samuel smiled in reply. ‘Always.’

Jayden closed his eyes and lay back down with a content look on his face. Samuel snuggled in beside him and poked him softly.

‘Jayden.’

‘Hmm?’

‘Your birthday is coming up.’

Jayden let out a groan at that. ‘Don’t remind me.’

Samuel frowned curiously. ‘I’ve always meant to ask; why do you hate your birthdays so much?’

‘You’re not going to like the answer.’

‘Tell me,’ Samuel insisted.

Jayden sighed and turned to face him. ‘Birthdays are meant to be a celebration of life. How am I supposed to celebrate my life when the people who gave it to me regret bringing me into the world?’

Samuel’s eyes filled with sadness. ‘I’m sorry you had to grow up like that.’

‘Don’t be, it’s not your fault.’

Samuel’s eyes grew determined. ‘I’m going to make sure that from now on we will celebrate your birthdays until they can only remind you that there are people who are happy that you are in this world. We are going to spend your birthdays surrounded by people who love you so that you would never forget how much you are wanted.’

Jayden’s lips lifted in a drowsy smile. ‘That’s a nice thought.’

Samuel watched as Jayden’s eyes finally surrendered to the pull of sleep, closing gently as his breathing slowly evened out. The body of the sleeping boy beside him appeared far too small and frail for someone who had gone through so much pain. He was reminded again that despite all of Jayden’s strength and ferocity, he was still a child who was forced to grow up far too quickly.

That child, however, would soon be turning into a man, and Samuel had a lot to plan for in order to be ready for that day. So as Jayden slept beside him, he settled in and began to think of the best way to throw the greatest birthday party of their lives.

Author’s Note: 

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