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Jayden started when the door suddenly banged open. He had been engrossed in his book and looked up in surprise to see a tearful Noel rush past him and into his room, swinging the door shut and locking himself in.
Jayden blinked in surprise for a couple of seconds before turning to glance at the clock. It was twenty minutes to midnight and he had not been expecting him back until long after that.
He got up and made his way to Noel’s door. He knocked softly and waited patiently for a response but all he could make out were the faint muffled sounds of someone crying.
He took a step back and studied the door as his mind worked furiously trying to figure out what to do. He went back to his seat on the couch and picked up his book deciding to give him some time.
After two hours, he tossed the book on the couch and stood up. He had had enough. Noel was still locked up in his room, refusing to open the door and Jayden was done waiting. He was going to get to the bottom of this whole mess.
He left their dorm and made his way out of the Sand. He made his way across the common lawn and into a building. He walked through the lobby, past the lounge and straight into an elevator.
He got off the elevator and walked along the corridor before coming to stop at a door. He knocked sharply and waited impatiently for it to be answered.
The door swung open to reveal a haggard Samuel. He was still dressed in his clothes though he had tossed the jacket aside and had rolled up the sleeves to his elbow and unbuttoned the top buttons, leaving the upper part of his chest bare.
He looked up at Jayden with surprise in his tired eyes. ‘What the-‘
Jayden dragged him out by the collar and shoved him against the wall with a surprising amount of strength considering he was smaller than him.
‘Speak.’
Samuel’s eyes widened at the attack. He glanced down at the hand pressing his chest with something akin to amusement knowing he could easily rip it off.
‘Whoa, calm down buddy. Take it easy.’
Jayden’s eyes narrowed dangerously. He removed his hand from his chest and curled it around his neck with his sharp nails pressing down dangerously close to his jugular.
‘I won’t ask again.’
Samuel gulped at the coldness in his tone. He was more than smart enough to recognize the threat he was in.
‘Okay, okay. Calm down. What do you want to know?’
‘What happened?’
Samuel knew what he meant. He let out a deep sigh. ‘Is he alright?’
Jayden’s grip tightened.
‘Alright, alright. We got to the ball and everyone was happy. We met with our dates and we left Noel with his as we danced with ours. I lost sight of him for an hour or so then I met him at the outdoor bar getting drinks for them both.
‘He seemed fine then and I managed to convince them to join me and my friends for a couple of games. He seemed reluctant at first but I dragged him over and he settled in alright. He even had fun, he was laughing and teasing with the rest of us.
‘Everything was fine until Valentina spun the bottle and it landed on Charles. She thought for a few seconds before daring Charles to kiss Noel.’
Jayden blinked.
‘Of course, he naturally refused and we all teased him until he was red with anger. He slammed his fist on the table and shot to his feet, marching up to Noel with fists clenched. I thought he was going to hit him, we all did so I shot to my feet to try and stop him but…’
‘But?’
‘He kissed him.’ Samuel said simply.
Jayden froze. ‘He what?’
‘He kissed him.’ Samuel looked contemplative. ‘And despite his aggression, he was surprisingly gentle. It was strangely sweet.’
Jayden frowned. ‘Continue.’
‘Anyway, after the kiss, we were all shocked into silence and Noel kinda spaced out. We continued the game and later Cherry spun the bottle and it pointed to Noel. She said she wanted to see him kiss a girl after kissing a boy so she dared him to kiss Pearl, his date.’
Jayden’s frown deepened.
‘He seemed unwilling and protested at first but we convinced him that he had no choice as it was a dare. He leaned in but he must have freaked out cause he jumped away and claimed he couldn’t. That’s where things took a turn for the worse.’
A light of understanding lit in Jayden’s eyes. ‘Go on.’
‘When he refused to kiss her a couple of guys started to get suspicious. They thought he was gay and proceeded to hurl homophobic slurs at him. They called him derogatory names and when he turned, almost in tears to Charles for help, he just added to the flames. It seemed that was the final straw. He couldn’t take it anymore and broke down but he bolted before Paul or I could reach him.
‘I chased after him and Paul stayed behind to quell the rumours. When I made sure he got back alright I left, deciding to give him some space.’
Jayden closed his eyes for a moment before opening them back again.
‘Don’t worry, Paul and I managed to kill the rumours. We explained that he had too much to drink and he wasn’t used to it so he got overwhelmed. They no longer think he’s gay, just a lightweight which is much better.’
Jayden didn’t seem to hear him. He was deep in thought as his mind went through the events that had just been described to him.
Samuel cleared his throat. ‘Erm… if you could let go of my neck I would greatly appreciate it.’
Jayden glanced down at his hand and after a moment, uncurled his fingers from his neck.
Samuel rubbed his neck, wincing. ‘For someone your size you’ve got quite the grip.’
Jayden just gave him a blank look.
Samuel paused before continuing. ‘Seriously, is he alright? I was going to check up on him after the ball but I guess I was too hungover to think properly.’
Jayden stared at him contemplatively. ‘He’ll live.’
He turned to leave but Samuel stopped him.
‘Maybe I should come with you, see if he’s fine.’
Jayden didn’t turn around. ‘No.’
‘But-.’
‘Goodnight.’
Noel was still holed up in his room when Jayden come back. He continued to remain on his bed when Jayden knocked tentatively on his door.
‘Noel?’
He didn’t answer. Jayden knocked again.
‘Please open the door.’
He knocked once more.
‘Look, I heard what happened. We need to talk.’
Noel continued to ignore him. He heard Jayden sigh and walk away. However, he soon heard a faint clicking noise before suddenly, the door swung open to reveal Jayden with a paperclip between his lips.
He removed it and placed it in his pocket before casting a concerned look at Noel who was lying in a foetal position.
‘Noel-‘
‘Don’t.’
He sniffled and let the tears fall. ‘Don’t.’
Jayden sighed. ‘It’s alright.’
‘No, it’s not.’
Jayden’s eyes filled with pity as he stared down at the crying boy on the bed. He moved to sit by him.
‘I know you’re-‘
‘Please don’t. Don’t say it. It would only make it real.’
‘There’s nothing wrong if it’s real.’
‘Yes, there is. You don’t know what it’s like. You don’t know what’s it like to be an outcast. You don’t know what it’s like for people to look at you with scorn. To treat you like you’re nothing, like you’re worse than a piece of filth. To judge you because of your background. I don’t need another reason for them to look at me with disgust. I don’t want it to be real.’
Jayden was filled with sorrow for the suffering boy on the bed when he heard the pain behind his words. He sighed before whispering.
‘I do.’
He took a deep breath before continuing. ‘I do know what it’s like. My family treats me as an outcast. My parents look at me with scorn. My father treats me like I’m nothing, like I’m worth less to him than a bag of garbage. My own father wishes that I was dead. He wishes it every day I draw breath all because I’m gay.’
Noel stopped sniffling.
‘Do you know what it’s like to watch the love leave your father’s eyes and fill with pure unbridled hate the moment he learns that his only son, his pride and joy, the light and love of his life is gay? Do you know what it’s like to see eyes that were once filled with so much love and adoration with so much hate and disgust?
‘I live with it everyday so yes, I do know what it’s like.’
Noel sat up and stared at him in shock. ‘You’re gay?’
Jayden let out a sad smile and nodded. ‘Yes, I am and so are you.’
Noel let out a sob. ‘But I don’t want to be! I don’t want it! I don’t want to be different! I want to be normal.’
Jayden felt his heart breaking. ‘It’s good to be different. It means you’re unique. Just because a couple of ignorant homophobic twits don’t get it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be proud of who we are. Just because they don’t accept us doesn’t mean we shouldn’t accept ourselves.’
Jayden smiled softly at him. ‘You are a rainbow boy who rides unicorns, be proud of it. If no one will accept you, I will and I will always be there for you. When you need me, I’ll be there and you can count on that.’
Noel let out a short tearful laugh. He jumped on Jayden, crushing him in a tight hug. ‘Thank you,’ he whispered.
Jayden tensed. He was not used to hugs and disliked them greatly but he relaxed and patted Noel’s back awkwardly.
‘Don’t mention it. Really, don’t. I don’t deserve thanks I’m a terrible fairy godfather. I always thought Cinderella had a shitty godmother but I couldn’t even get you to midnight! It’s embarrassing.’
Noel chuckled. ‘Don’t worry, it was still a magical experience so thank you for giving me that.’
Jayden grinned. ‘Don’t mention it. After all, what are best friends for?’
Noel gasped and crushed him tighter. ‘Really?’
Jayden winced, for a small guy Noel had a pretty strong grip. ‘Yes, really. Now stop feeling sad.’
Noel giggled before letting out a cheer. ‘Finally! I told you we would be best friends. We’re perfect for each other.’
Jayden sighed and leaned back. Noel wasn’t letting go any time soon and as he began to chatter off, he knew his ribs and ears would be sore for the rest of the night but he smiled anyway. It was worth it if it brought a smile to Noel’s face and he was willing to endure anything to make sure that smile never leaves.
AUTHOR’S NOTE:
Sorry for the late update, I had been in a slump lately. But hey, it’s here now.
What did you think of the chapter? A bit emotional right? This is something that every member of the LGBTQ+ community go through and I drew heavily on my own experiences for both Noel and Jayden.
To every one who is going through something similar or is going through something at all, remember, YOU ARE LOVED. I know what it’s like and it would be fine. It might not seem that way for a long time, it still isn’t for me but I have hope and you should too. It’s hope that makes us go on.
There is light at the end of the tunnel, it get’s darker before the dawn, the sun will come out tomorrow and so on and so forth. It’s all been said and I could quote a myriad more but words are meaningless if you don’t believe in them, if you don’t internalize them. And that’s the most difficult part,… belief. It is a challenge to yourself you have to take up, a trial you have to overcome and a test you have to win.
We are all in this together. Have faith.
Much love,
Akhenate.
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