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Youngjae and Gabe’s Graduation day 2020
The afternoon sun spilled lazily through the blinds of Youngjae’s dorm room, warming the tangled sheets where Luke lay sprawled, half on his stomach, half draped across Young’s bare chest. The room smelled like sex and Youngjae. It was a mix Luke had grown embarrassingly attached to over the past few years.
Young’s graduation gown hung crookedly on the wardrobe door. Luke kept staring at it, still unable to wrap his head around the fact that tomorrow his boyfriend (and his brother) were actually graduating. They were actual adults now. Done with college. Out into the world.
“That’s insane,” Luke muttered into Young’s throat.
“What is?” Young hummed, running a slow hand up and down Luke’s exposed spine.
“That my parents booked out an entire fucking restaurant.” Luke tilted his head back so he could glare at him properly. “Like…a whole restaurant. For you two idiots.”
Young barked a laugh. “Your mom said something about wanting ‘a night worthy of celebration.'”
“She’s crazy,” Luke grumbled.
“You love her.”
“Yeah, but she’s crazy.”
Young grinned and tugged him closer, lips brushing Luke’s hairline. “They’re proud of you too, you know. They wouldn’t even think about doing something that big unless they knew you’d be there to enjoy it.”
“I literally contribute nothing to the graduating part.”
“You contribute emotional support,” Young argued. “Which is harder than it looks.”
Luke rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Still crazy.”
Young nodded thoughtfully. “You’re probably even more annoyed because they made you stay in a hotel.”
Luke groaned and covered his face with both hands. “Oh my god, don’t even get me started. Like, I have a dorm. I would have been perfectly find staying there.”
Young snorted. “At least they didn’t book you into our dorms.”
“Don’t. My mother absolutely thought about it.”
They fell into a warm, lazy silence. Outside, someone shouted down the hall about finals-week stress still clinging to the building despite classes being over. In here though, everything felt calm. Still. Suspended in their own bubble.
Luke stretched his arms above his head. Young’s hand instinctively moved to slide over Luke’s waist, thumb brushing deliberately over the soft skin. Luke melted like butter.
“You nervous for tomorrow?” Young asked quietly.
Luke shook his head. “Not for the ceremony. But for the after party? Yes. Because that’s a lot of parents and friends and attention all in one place.”
“And you hate attention,” Young teased.
Luke flicked his forehead. “Shut up. You love attention.”
“No, I love your attention.”
Luke froze. Then he shoved Young hard enough that the bed shook. “You can’t just say stuff like that casually!”
“But it’s true,” Young laughed, catching Luke’s wrist and pulling him back down. “And tomorrow’s gonna be fine. We’ll sit together at the restaurant. I’ll keep your glass full. You can make fun of your dad’s toast with me.”
“My dad’s toast is going to be, like, thirty minutes long.”
“And I’ll listen to every word because I love him.”
“You’re such a liar.”
They were quiet again, Luke tracing slow circles on Young’s bare chest, Young watching him with the softest expression. That same expression that still made Luke’s entire heart feel too big for his ribs.
“Hey,” Young murmured eventually. “Thank you for being here. For real.”
Luke blinked up at him. “What do you mean? Of course I’d be here.”
“I know,” Young said, brushing his thumb across Luke’s cheekbone. “You didn’t have to follow me through college and stress and all my bullshit. But you did. I’m grateful.”
Luke swallowed. His heart did that stupid somersault it always did when Young got unbearably sincere. “I’d follow you anywhere,” he whispered. “You know that.”
Young pulled Luke into a slow, lingering kiss.
Tomorrow would be chaotic. Emotional. Loud. Beautiful. A celebration for the two people Luke loved more than anything. But right now, in the quiet of the almost-empty dorm, it was just them. Just Luke and Youngjae, curled into each other, laughing about his parents’ dramatic party-planning and ignoring the world outside for one more slow, perfect evening.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
The restaurant Luke’s parents had hired out wasn’t ridiculously fancy, but it looked fancy. There was warm lighting, dark wooden beams, vines draped over the ceiling, and enough polished glassware to make Luke scared of knocking anything over. Big round tables filled the open floor, each set with white tablecloths and navy ribbons. It was cosy enough to feel celebratory, but posh enough that Luke kept smoothing down his shirt, hyper-aware of every crease.
And, of course, it was filled to the brim with lacrosse jocks. Loud, broad, half-drunk, too many teeth in their smiles lacrosse jocks.
Luke plastered on a polite smile every time one of them passed him with a clap on the back or a “You Gabe’s little brother? Congrats to him, man!” but internally he was dying a slow, painful death. The smell of beer, expensive cologne, and competitive male energy was suffocating.
This was not his scene.
But tonight wasn’t for him. It was for Gabe and Young and he was determined not to be the sulky little boy in the corner. Even if he was, in fact, standing in the corner sulking.
The worst part was that he’d barely seen Young since arriving. Every time Luke scanned the room for him, Young was already surrounded by teammates ruffling his hair, slapping him on the back, dragging him into group pictures. Every time Luke even tried to take a step in his direction, someone intercepted Luke with a cheerful question about Gabe. Or demanded a family photo. Or shoved a glass of champagne into his hand.
Young caught his eye once from across the room once and gave him a tiny apologetic smile. A later smile. A I promise I’ll come find you smile. Luke held onto it like a lifeline.
He was mid-sip of a drink he didn’t even like when the restaurant doors opened again, and two very familiar figures arrived. Eli and Nate stepped inside like they owned the place. Eli was in a ridiculously sparkly jacket because of course he was, and Nate was in a soft cream shirt that made him look stupidly wholesome next to his gremlin boyfriend. They scanned the room, spotted Luke instantly, and Eli waved so wildly a waiter flinched.
Luke exhaled for the first time all night. “Thank god you’re here,” he muttered as they approached.
Eli flung himself at him dramatically. “Luke Davies! You look like you’re three seconds away from collapsing.”
“I am,” Luke deadpanned. “There are too many muscles in this room. I feel like I’m being hunted.”
Nate snorted. “Where’s Young?”
Luke’s eyes drifted helplessly toward the cluster of teammates in the back corner. “Being swallowed alive by jocks.”
Eli grimaced. “Ew.”
“Exactly.”
And just like that, the atmosphere around Luke eased and the tightness in his chest loosening as Eli looped an arm through his and Nate squeezed his shoulder in a quiet greeting. He wasn’t alone anymore. Now he could finally breathe in this ridiculous, testosterone-infested graduation party.
Luke gave Eli’s jacket a once-over and snorted. “You realise you look gayer every single time I see you, right?”
Eli flicked his wrist dramatically. “Good. I’m trying to blind the straights.”
Nate sighed. “You nearly blinded the Uber driver.”
“That was intentional,” Eli said.
Luke laughed for the first time all evening, the tightness in his chest easing. He didn’t get to enjoy the moment for long though, because his mom and dad appeared beside them, both glowing with the same proud energy they’d been carrying all day.
“There you are,” Luke’s mom beamed, placing a gentle hand on his back. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
Luke coughed into his drink. “I’ve been around.”
His dad nodded warmly to Eli and Nate. “Good to see you boys. You clean up well.”
“We do, don’t we?” Eli preened, earning a playful eye-roll from Nate.
Luke’s mom nudged him with her shoulder. “Are you having fun, sweetheart? You look less tense now.”
“I’m… adjusting,” Luke said diplomatically, which made Eli snort a little.
Then Luke’s dad clapped his hands together with the kind of confidence only a middle-aged man in charge of a restaurant he paid for could have. “Right,” he announced, “it’s almost time.”
Luke blinked. “Time for what?”
“The speeches,” his dad said cheerfully.
Eli choked on air. “Speeches? As in plural?”
Luke’s stomach dropped. “Oh my god, you’re actually making speeches? I thought that was a joke.”
“Of course we are,” his dad said. “It’s a proper graduation dinner! People expect a bit of ceremony.”
“Dad,” Luke whispered in horror, “these people are drunk lacrosse players. They don’t expect anything.”
But it was too late because Luke’s mom was already smoothing down her dress, his dad was clearing his throat dramatically, and a few jocks were hitting each other going, “Oi, shut up, the grownups are doing something.”
Luke looked at Eli helplessly.
Eli just patted his arm. “Good luck,” he whispered. “If your dad cries, I’m filming it.”
“Asshole,” Luke hissed.
Everyone slowly drifted back to their seats, scraping chairs and half-drunken laughter echoing through the restaurant. Luke slid into his spot and finally Youngjae appeared beside him, dropping into the seat with a quiet sigh, brushing shoulders with Luke beneath the table. Luke’s chest loosened. It was the first proper moment they’d managed together all night.
Across the room, Gabe and Maddy were curled up together at a table with half the lacrosse team, Maddy tucked under Gabe’s arm, her head on his shoulder. They looked genuinely happy, but there was something stiff about Gabe’s posture, something Luke couldn’t quite place.
Then Luke’s dad cleared his throat into the microphone. The restaurant gradually quietened. He looked out across the room and then he began.
“I just want to start by saying how unbelievably proud your mom and I are.” His voice wobbled slightly, but he pushed on with a warm smile. “Gabe, Young… you’ve worked so hard for this moment. We’ve watched you grow from boys who could barely carry a lacrosse stick without tripping over your own feet—”
Youngjae covered a laugh with his hand.
Gabe groaned loudly. “Come on, dad.”
“—into young men who have achieved more than we ever could’ve imagined,” dad continued.
The room hummed with affectionate laughter.
Luke felt Young’s knee bump his under the table; it wasn’t on purpose, but neither of them moved away.
“And beyond the degrees, beyond the trophies…” Luke’s dad continued, “what your mother and I are most proud of is the kind of men you’ve become. Kind. Loyal. Hardworking. You’ve made our home warmer just by being in it.”
Young swallowed hard beside Luke.
“And speaking of home…” his dad added, voice softening, “we’re grateful that, in gaining Gabe a diploma today, we also gained another son along the way. You both mean the absolute world to us. We love you a lot.”
The words fell over the room like warmth.
Luke’s breath hitched.
Youngjae blinked rapidly, eyes shining, and Luke reached for his hand under the table.
Gabe, though…Gabe lowered his head slightly. His smile faltered, almost imperceptibly. Maddy noticed; she tightened her hold on his arm, whispering something, but he didn’t fully respond.
Luke’s stomach ached.
The speech wrapped up with applause, cheers, glasses clinking together.
Young turned to Luke, eyes soft, whispering, “Your dad’s trying to make me cry in public.”
Luke smiled shakily. “He did a good job.”
“God, if this is what his speech is like at a damn graduation, what’s he going to do when it’s our wedding? I won’t make it out alive,” Young muttered.
Luke’s cheeks grew hot. “Wedding?” he squeaked.
Young’s lips curled upwards. “Oh, absolutely. You better be ready to open a joint bank account.”
Luke could tell he was blushing like crazy.
But even as Young leaned into him and kissed him, basking in the affection Luke’s family had offered so freely… Luke couldn’t stop glancing at Gabe across the room. Because while everyone else was celebrating, Gabe looked like the only one trying not to fall apart.
Music crackled through the speakers. It was something loud and celebratory. Chairs scraped back as people flooded the dance floor. Someone dimmed the lights. Laughter rose instantly.
Luke’s eyes drifted to the front of the restaurant just in time to see Gabe and Maddy slip out the side door. Maddy’s hand was on Gabe’s back, rubbing little circles as she whispered something to him. Gabe nodded stiffly, jaw clenched, and disappeared with her into the night breeze.
A knot tightened in Luke’s stomach.
Before he could stare too long, a warm hand found his. Youngjae leaned down slightly, smiling in that soft way that always melted Luke’s bones. “Wanna dance with me?” he asked quietly and almost shyly, as if they weren’t allowed to be a little selfish tonight.
“Yeah,” Luke breathed. “I really do.”
They moved to the dance floor, fitting together easily, Luke’s hands sliding up around Young’s neck. Youngjae held him by the waist, firm but gentle, and it felt right. So right. For a moment Luke forgot they weren’t alone until Eli’s loud voice carried over the music.
“Look at them!” Eli whooped from across the dance floor, Nate laughing beside him. “Gross! They’re in their own little romance movie!”
Luke flushed all the way to his ears. Young just smirked, tugging Luke closer, whispering, “Let them talk.”
And they kept swaying, Luke tucked into Young’s chest, the world blurring into lights and noise around them.
Eventually, the restaurant door opened again. Gabe and Maddy stepped back inside. Maddy looked calm. Gabe…looked like he was trying. He strode straight toward a table, grabbed a tall champagne flute, and knocked it back in one go. Then he snatched another glass off the tray a waiter was carrying and tossed that one back too.
Then he headed to a cluster of lacrosse boys, slipping instantly into their circle, slapping backs, laughing too loudly, pretending he was absolutely fine.
Luke’s chest tightened.
Young followed Luke’s gaze and frowned slightly, his hands still resting on Luke’s waist. “You okay?” Young murmured.
Luke swallowed. “Yeah.”
But really, it was worry coiling through him. Everyone here was drinking. That was true. It wasn’t unusual at a celebration like this. But Gabe didn’t look like he was drinking to celebrate. He was drinking to forget. Luke knew it. But he also knew (painfully) that tonight wasn’t the moment to bring it up. Not with a room full of people. Not with champagne on every table. Not with Gabe already teetering on the edge.
So Luke lifted his chin, forced himself to meet Youngjae’s warm gaze, and whispered, “Dance with me a bit more?”
Young smiled gently. “Always.”
And so they danced while Gabe drifted further into the noise and the blur of his own celebration.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
By the time the party wound down, the restaurant had thinned into scattered clusters of drunk laughter, tired hugs, and a few people swaying half–asleep in booths. Staff were beginning to clear tables. Music had softened to a lazy hum.
Luke finally peeled himself away from Youngjae’s side. He needed to find Gabe before the night ended.
His brother was by the bar, leaning heavily on his forearms while two of his old teammates recounted something he’d clearly stopped listening to ten minutes ago. His eyes were glazed, his smile loose and delayed.
Luke approached slowly. “Hey,” he said, nudging Gabe’s arm. “Congrats. You were amazing today.”
Gabe blinked at him, like his brain needed an extra second to recognise who was talking. Then he grinned, broad and wide. “Lukey!” he slurred slightly, pulling him into a sudden one–armed hug that smelled like champagne and cheap cologne. “Hey. You made it.”
Luke forced a small smile. “What? Of course I did. I was always going to be here.”
“Yeah…” Gabe nodded, eyes drifting off for a second before snapping back. “Yeah, I know. I know.” He straightened, trying to look more sober than he was.
“How’s the pro league going?” Luke asked.
“Uh, yeah. Yeah. It’s, uh… it’s good. Really good. Start training full–time next month now that college is officially over. I can finally put in my all.”
“That’s amazing. I’m proud of you.”
Gabe nodded. “Thanks. I can’t wait,” he said with a forced laugh. “Just… ready to get out there, you know? No more homework, no more… crap. Just lacrosse. My thing.”
Luke nodded, but his heart ached. Gabe was trying so hard to act normal. To act functional. His words were clear, but everything underneath them was wobbling.
“You must be exhausted,” Luke tried. “It’s been a long day.”
Gabe waved a hand. “Nah. I’m good. I’m—” He swayed slightly but caught himself. “Just celebrating. Big night. Gotta… gotta do it right.”
Luke swallowed, watching the tiredness leak through his brothers expression between every blink. He knew drunk-Gabe too well. This wasn’t mean drunk. Or loud drunk. This was sad drunk, the kind he always tried to hide.
“Where’s Maddy?” Luke asked.
“Oh, she left,” Gabe grumbled. “Wanted an early night or something. Didn’t wanna look after me.”
“Gabe,” Luke said softly, “do you want me to help you get to the car? Or—”
“No, no,” Gabe cut in quickly, eager, defensive. “I’m fine. Seriously. I’m good.” He patted Luke’s shoulder far too hard. “Go enjoy your boy. I know you’re dying to.”
Luke flushed, both embarrassed and stung. “It’s not like that. I just wanted to check in on you.”
Gabe’s eyes flickered with something raw. Something tired. Something Luke couldn’t name. “I’m good,” Gabe repeated, quieter. “Really.”
Luke nodded, even though he didn’t believe it. He didn’t push. Not tonight. Not while Gabe was a breath away from crumbling in front of all his old teammates.
“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow morning?”
“Yeah.” Gabe nodded, eyes glazed. “Tomorrow.”
Luke gave him one last gentle squeeze on the arm. Gabe didn’t move or look back, just stood there swaying slightly, staring at nothing, holding himself together with clenched fists and steady breaths.
And Luke walked away, heart heavy, wishing more than anything that his big brother didn’t feel so unbearably alone.
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