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Graduation 2018
Luke tightened his grip on the folded pages in his hands until they trembled. He had rehearsed this dumb speech a hundred times. In the mirror. In his bedroom. In the shower. To Eli. To the neighbours dog. To his favourite art teacher. To a very enthusiastic Youngjae over FaceTime.
But standing here behind the heavy velvet curtains of the school auditorium, the words looked foreign. Like they belonged to someone else. Someone confident and composed and not currently on the verge of vomiting into a recycling bin backstage.
The muffled roar of the crowd filtered through the curtains he was stood behind. Principal Lowthorp’s voice boomed from the microphone, introducing names, stories and achievements. The energy in the room was electric. Pride. Anticipation. The hum of a new chapter beginning.
Luke pressed a shaky palm to his chest and peeked through a slit in the curtain. God, there were rows and rows of people just sitting there, waiting. Parents. Friends. Teachers. Classmates he’d grown up with. Classmates he’d fought with. Classmates he’d barely spoken to. So many eyes. Too many eyes.
His gaze searched for something grounding, and then he saw them. His parents. His dad’s arm was casually swung around mom’s shoulder and both of them were beaming. Gabe sat beside them, slightly slouched, with Maddy next to him. And next to Maddy—
Luke’s breath caught.
Youngjae. Clean-shaven, curtain hair falling perfectly across his forehead, wearing a crisp shirt like he hadn’t sprinted here from Boston at dawn. He looked calm. Collected. Beautiful. And his eyes were fixed on the stage as if waiting for Luke to appear.
Luke swallowed hard. His stomach twisted, but not in the bad way. Not in the oh-god-I’m-going-to-screw-this-up way. More like the oh-god-I-really-love-that-he’s-here way.
Nate was sat next to Eli’s dad. The older man looked proud, his arms folded and jaw tight as if he was trying not to cry. Luke felt a lump in his throat.
And then Luke saw Noah. He was seated a few rows behind Eli. His hands were folded neatly in his lap, his posture stiff. His eyes were unfocused, staring at the stage but not really seeing it. There was no anger on his face. No bitterness. Just a kind of quiet dullness Luke wasn’t prepared for. He tore his gaze away before it could hit him too hard.
Not now. Not here. This moment wasn’t about that. This moment was about everything he had survived. Everything he had earned. Everything he was becoming. He inhaled sharply, holding the breath until his lungs ached. Then let it out slowly. He had a speech to deliver. He was valedictorian. He worked for this. He deserved this.
Noah’s presence pulled at him, but he shoved the feeling down ruthlessly.
Focus. Focus on the speech. Focus on the people who came here for you.
Luke squared his shoulders. His heartbeat thundered, but his spine straightened with determination. When the principal finally called, “And now, our valedictorian… Luke Davies.”
Luke took a shaky breath and stepped up to the podium, fingers trembling around the edges of his speech. The bright lights warmed his face, the curtains muffled the world behind him, and for a moment he just… breathed. Then he looked out at the sea of faces of family, friends, classmates he’d grown up with, and something inside him steadied.
He adjusted the microphone. “Hi,” he said. The mic squeaked a little with feedback and a small laugh rippled through the room. Luke winced and cleared his throat a little. “Uh, I’m Luke Davies, and I… really didn’t think I’d get this emotional before even starting this speech, so that’s a great sign.”
More laughter.
Good. He could do this.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about what senior year actually is,” he started. “People love to say it’s a chapter closing, a big ending, a goodbye, but that never felt right to me. Senior year isn’t just an ending. It’s a series of moments. Tiny ones, weird ones, beautiful ones, ones we thought we’d forget but actually never will. The ones that made us into who we are now.”
He glanced briefly toward Eli who was already wiping his eyes dramatically.
“I love this class,” Luke said, voice warming. “I know that’s cheesy, but honestly? You’re some of the funniest, loudest, most chaotic people I’ve ever met. You’re also some of the kindest. And bravest. And relentlessly yourselves. You’ve taught me so much just by existing.”
He swallowed, turning to a more vulnerable part of the speech.
“When I first came out as trans… I was terrified. You all know by now that I didn’t exactly come out silently.” A ripple of soft laughter echoed through the hall. His eyes briefly caught Naoh’s and his ex-boyfriend’s face remained blank for a few heavy seconds, before he relaxed his features and offered Luke a tiny smile. Luke could feel the lump rising in his throat. “But I was scared because being ‘different’ never seemed like a good thing. Or an easy thing. And yet… I look out at this room, and I remember moments where people here showed me compassion, and respect, and eventually… acceptance. I want to say thank you. To the ones who stood up for me. To the ones who learned with me. To the ones who got things wrong, but tried anyway. Being different isn’t bad. It’s just human. You all reminded me of that.”
He inhaled slowly, voice thickening.
“I want to thank my friends, who have dragged me out of every dark place imaginable without ever complaining. Eli, you literally adopted me at fifteen and never gave me back. Nate, you’re the only person who can match his emotional energy. And to my brother who pretends he’s not soft but absolutely is, you’re the reason I’m brave. And… Mom and Dad,” he said, looking directly at them, “you’re the reason I’m here at all. In every sense. Thank you for loving me exactly as I am.”
His voice wavered, just slightly, but he held steady.
“And finally,” Luke said, straightening, “to the class of 2018. Make each moment count. Even the small ones. Especially the small ones. Don’t forget the things this place taught you. Not the maths formulas—we’ve all agreed we’re deleting those the second we walk out of here. But the real lessons. How to be people. How to care. How to start again when things fall apart. Graduation isn’t the end. It’s just another moment… and we get to choose what moment comes next.”
He lifted his paper slightly, his smile soft but certain.
“Thank you. All of you. I’ll never forget this.”
The auditorium erupted into applause, warm and loud and overwhelming, and Luke stepped back, his heart full to the brim.
He stayed at the podium with Principal Lowthorp, his heart finally beginning to slow from the adrenaline of his speech. His job wasn’t done yet—valedictorian duties meant standing up front while diplomas were handed out, shaking hands, smiling for photos, pretending he wasn’t seconds away from bursting into either laughter or tears at any given moment.
Principal Lowthorp cleared his throat into the microphone. “Alright! Let’s begin. When I call your name, please come up to receive your diploma.”
The ceremony rolled on with names, clapping and cheers. Luke shook his classmates hands, said “congratulations” about a twenty times and they were only on the letter C.
“Elijah Coleman,” Mr Lowthorp called out.
Luke barely had time to brace himself before Eli bolted onto the stage like he’d been shot out of a cannon. Instead of turning toward Principal Lowthorp, he made a beeline for Luke, grabbed him by the cheeks with both hands, and kissed him square on the mouth. The gymnasium exploded; Students screamed. Parents howled with laughter. Someone wolf-whistled. Principal Lowthorp sighed into the microphone in the most defeated dad voice imaginable.
Luke stumbled back with a horrified wheeze. “Eli!”
Eli held up his diploma like a trophy. “GRADUATION TRADITION, BABY!” he shouted.
“It is absolutely not a tradition!” Principal Lowthorp barked, trying not to smile.
Eli jogged off the stage, an absolute menace, bowing dramatically as the crowd continued roaring. Luke just stood there, face red enough to combust.
Eventually the names continued and the moment Luke had been dreaded arrived.
“Noah Lowthorp,” Principal Lowthrop called out.
Luke held his breath and watched as his ex boyfriend and ex best friend walked onto the stage. He got his diploma handed to him by his father and then went down the line to shake hands of all the teachers. Eventually, he stopped in front of Luke and the shorter boy held his breath. They hadn’t exactly ended on the best of terms after their break up.
“Thanks,” Noah said, his hand shooting out.
Luke looked down at his hand and then back up to Noah. “Uh, for what?” Luke asked timidly, reaching out and shaking Noah’s hand gently.
“For being my first friend in a brand new school,” Noah replied with a little shrug. “Despite what happened, it meant a lot to me.”
“Oh,” Luke mumbled. “It’s fine. I…I liked being your friend.”
Noah’s expression shifted to brief sadness but then he plastered a small smile on his face. “Me too,” he said in a small voice. “And i’m sorry for the way it ended.”
“No, i’m sorry,” Luke rushed out immediately. “It was all me. I was a shitty boyfriend.”
“Think we were both were,” Noah admitted.
Luke swallowed thickly and nodded, unsure of what else to say.
“Well, I guess i’ll see you around, Luke Davies,” Noah said, taking a step away.
Only in that moment did Luke realise they were still holding each others hands in a firm handshake.
“Uh, yeah,” Luke pulled his hand out of Noah’s quickly and nodded. “Yeah, see you around Noah. Good luck.”
“You too,” Noah said, smiling a little. Then he walked off, and didn’t look back.
Luke let out a shaky exhale.
The ceremony finally finished, though Luke was convinced the parents in the back were still giggling about his ambush kiss. When the last name was called and the graduation caps went flying into the air, chaos filled the gym. People hugged. People cried. People took hundreds of photos. Music blasted through the speakers.
Luke hopped off the stage and started searching for his family. He didn’t have to look for long. His mom barrelled into him first, wrapping him in the kind of hug that squeezed the breath out of him. His dad joined a second later, lifting him off the ground slightly as he laughed, “You did it, kiddo!”
Gabe caught him next, pulling him into a crushing headlock-hug. “My little brother is the smartest little squirt in the universe,” he boomed.
“Gabe. I need air.”
Gabe grinned and let go of him.
Youngjae slipped in from the side. “Hey,” he said with a big grin, almost as big as Gabe’s.
“Youngjae,” Luke said, eyes briefly flickering around and then landing back on his secret boyfriend. “What are you doing here? I thought families could only get 4 tickets per graduate.”
“Yeah, well,” he shrugged, “Eli only had his father and Nate, so I kinda swung by and grabbed a spare ticket off him.”
“You did?” Luke blinked.
Young shrugged as if it was no big deal.
“You didn’t think he’d miss his best friends little brother’s graduation, did you?” Gabe chimed in, putting both hands on Young’s shoulders. “This guys gonna be that weird uncle in the family that has absolutely no blood relation but still comes to every family event anyway.”
Luke didn’t know whether to cringe or cry at that comment. His eyes met Young’s soft brown hues and a silent conversation passed between them.
“Ice cream?” mom suddenly suggested.
Instantly, everyone nodded enthusiastically.
They left the school car park in two separate cars, meeting again outside the little ice-cream parlour Luke had gone to since he was a kid. It smelled like vanilla and waffle cones and childhood. Inside, the six of them squeezed into a big corner booth—Mom, Dad, Luke, Gabe, Maddy, and Youngjae.
Luke and Youngjae sat nowhere near each other, of course. Luke knew exactly why: neither of them trusted themselves to sit within touching distance without doing something catastrophically obvious
Dad grinned as he looked around the table. “Well then. What’s everyone getting? And Young, I know you’re strict about this new diet you seem to be on, but I’ve decided ice cream is mandatory for new household members.”
Youngjae huffed a laugh, shoulders relaxing. “Yes sir.”
“Good lad.” Dad clapped him on the back like he’d just drafted him into a rugby team. “By the way, we’ve got your room situation sorted. Didn’t want you stuck on the sofa or in Gabe’s goblin nest, so we’ve converted the basement into a proper cosy bedroom.”
Young’s eyes widened. “Seriously?”
“Properly done up,” Dad said proudly. “Fresh paint, new bed, heater, little reading lamp. All yours for as long as you need it.”
Youngjae blinked hard, and Luke watched that quick moment where he had to swallow emotion before it showed on his face.
Then Mom chimed in, cheeks pink. “Just so you know, sweetheart… the washing machine and dryer are down there. So I might need to pop in sometimes…”
“Mom,” Gabe groaned, face in his hands. “Say that before you make the room sound cool.”
Young burst out laughing. “It’s fine, Mrs Davies. Honestly. I don’t mind.”
“Good, because bags of laundry wait for no man,” Mum said softly, though her eyes shone with warmth, the kind reserved for people she had quietly decided were part of the family.
Everyone ordered. Luke got mint chocolate chip, Young got cookies and cream, and Gabe got the largest possible sundae because apparently adulthood had not shifted his priorities whatsoever.
The conversation drifted easily until Dad said, halfway through his cone, “And next week is the big day, isn’t it?”
Luke stiffened slightly. He felt Youngjae glance over, quick and subtle.
“Yeah.” Luke nodded, licking melted ice cream off his thumb. “Just one week.”
Maddy nudged him with an excited grin. “You’re gonna look so good. Like, insane levels of good. You’re gonna forget you ever stressed about this.”
Luke flushed, ducking his head. “I’m not worried about how I’m gonna look,” he mumbled. “I’m just… nervous, I guess. Especially about recovery and scars.”
Dad reached over and squeezed Luke’s wrist. “Being nervous means you’re human. Doesn’t make it any less right for you.”
Mom nodded. “We’re proud of you and we’ll be with you every step of the way.”
Gabe chimed in while shovelling his dessert into his mouth. “I’m telling you now, I’m sleeping in your room the night before so you don’t bottle it last minute.”
Luke rolled his eyes. “Gabe, i’ve been waiting for this, for like, three years. I’m not bottling it.”
“You better not. I already bragged to everyone at Harvard that my little brother is gonna have a cooler chest than half the lads on campus.”
“Gabe!” Luke hissed, horrified.
Youngjae nearly inhaled his ice cream from laughing, then quickly composed himself when Gabe glanced his way with a smirk. Luke watched him carefully. He could see the small smile and the softened eyes. Young wasn’t saying anything, but Luke could feel it. The silent encouragement. The pride. The certainty. And it steadied him. In a way nothing else did.
The rest of the table carried on chatting, but Luke sat back, letting the warmth of the moment seep into him. In one week, everything would change. And, fuck, Luke was ready.
⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧
The Davies’ living room was glowing with warm lamplight, the low hum of chatter blending with clinking of wine glasses and the occasional burst of laughter. Luke’s family had gone all out for the little graduation after-party. Bowls of crisps were everywhere, fairy lights glowed across the mantel, and the house smelled of freshly baked cookies his mom had made just because it felt like a celebration day.
Luke stood shoulder-to-shoulder with Eli near the snack table, replaying the moment Eli had kissed him on stage. Eli was reenacting it dramatically, waving his hands around as Nate pretended to die of second-hand embarrassment behind him.
“I swear to God,” Eli said, “your face was like—” he scrunched his features together, crossed his eyes, then stuck out his tongue.
Luke burst out laughing. “Shut up! I was in shock! I thought Principal Lowthorp was gonna throw me off the stage.”
“Honestly,” Nate sighed, “I don’t know how you two haven’t been expelled yet.”
“Neither do I,” Eli laughed.
“Is this classed as cheating?” Luke asked pointedly.
“No because you hated every second of it,” Eli replied.
“Oh, so just sexual assault then?” Luke asked dryly.
Eli winced. “Don’t say it like that.”
“He’s not wrong,” Nate said.
Eli gasped. “Stop that. Don’t make me feel like I’m some kind of creeper!”
Luke barely had time to respond before something tugged at his attention from the corner of his eye. Gabe was at the drinks table pouring himself another very full glass. Maddy was next to him, gently putting a hand on his wrist.
“Slow down,” she murmured.
He yanked his hand back. “Don’t. I’m fine, Mads. Jesus.”
Maddy just stared at him blankly.
Luke’s stomach tightened. He gave Eli and Nate a small, apologetic smile. “Give me a sec.”
“Sure,” Eli nodded, already turning to give Nate his full undivided attention.
Luke slipped through the crowd until he reached his brother and Maddy. Up close, Gabe’s eyes were unfocused and his jaw was clenched tight. He wasn’t slurring yet, but Luke could see the simmer beneath his skin.
“Hey,” Luke said lightly, nudging Gabe’s elbow. “Pretty sure you’ve outdrunk half the adults here.”
Gabe looked over at him and smirked a little. “What can I say? I’m celebrating my little brothers achievements.”
“I know,” Luke nodded with a small smile. “And you deserve to. But… maybe pace yourself? You’ve barely eaten anything.”
Gabe shrugged, raising the glass to his mouth, but Luke quickly and gently placed a hand over the top of the cup, blocking it.
Gabe frowned. “What are you doing?”
Luke didn’t move his hand. Instead, he tilted his head, lowering his voice. “Look, you’re gonna feel like crap tomorrow, and I’m not dealing with you groaning at sunrise interrupting my beauty sleep.”
Gabe blinked in confusion and Luke could see the irritation in his face. It occured to Luke in that moment that Gabe was probably still blissfully unaware of the fact that Luke knew about his little problem. Youngjae must not have mentioned that Luke knew.
“Come on. Talk to me about Harvard. Or… you know…” Luke nodded toward their mom, who was currently doting on Youngjae as if he were her third son. “You and Young are gonna be, what, twenty minutes away from me next year? Thought you’d be buzzing about that.”
Gabe’s expression softened a fraction. “Yeah. I mean… yeah. It’ll be cool.”
Luke kept talking, gently steering the conversation away from the drink still in Gabe’s hand. “You’ll be sick of me,” he teased. “Constantly showing up, barging in, stealing your hoodie because I ‘forgot mine’ and eating all your food because I can barely cook for myself.”
“What makes you think I can cook?” Gabe snorted.
“Guess we’re both starving then.” Luke grinned. “We should spend the summer cooking here. Finding easy recipes, ya know? Practice for the real thing.”
Maddy visibly relaxed beside them. Gabe set the drink down (slowly, but he set it down) and Luke felt the knot in his stomach loosen.
That’s when Luke sensed someone watching. He glanced across the room to see Youngjae talking politely to Luke’s parents, but his eyes were flickering over. Checking on Gabe. Checking on Luke. Making sure things didn’t boil over. Luke pretended not to see him. He couldn’t risk any new emotions resurfacing tonight.
Instead, he slid his arm around Gabe’s shoulder, nudging him. “Come on. Eli’s dad wants to show you the ridiculous golf swing he thinks is impressive.”
Gabe groaned loudly. “Oh God. The man’s a menace, just like his son.”
Maddy laughed and wrapped her arms around Gabe’s waist. “Come on, baby. Let’s go be social.”
Gabe allowed himself to be dragged away, grumbling affectionately. And Luke exhaled, relieved that for tonight at least, he’d pulled his brother back from the edge.
Young caught Luke the moment Gabe and Maddy drifted off toward Eli’s dad. He stepped into Luke’s path with that quiet, careful concern he always wore when it came to Gabe—or Luke.
“You okay?” Young murmured.
Luke sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah. Just… Gabe’s getting snappy.”
Young’s expression softened into something sad and knowing. “I saw.”
“He’s fine,” Luke said.
“For now,” Young muttered, looking over at his best friend who just looked downright bored talking to Mr Coleman. “He’ll be fine. He’s got us to look out for him.”
Luke gave him a small, grateful look, but before either of them could say anything else, Luke’s dad appeared in the doorway, eyebrows raised. “Son? Can I borrow you for a minute?”
Luke blinked. “Uh, yeah, sure.”
He glanced once at Young, who nodded gently, as if urging him to go. Luke followed his dad out the back door and into the cool evening air. Fairy lights glowed along the fence. The hum of laughter from inside was muffled out here. The two of them sat on the patio steps, shoulder to shoulder. For a long moment, Dad didn’t say anything. He stared out at the dark garden, exhaling slowly.
“You know,” he finally said, voice low, “when you were a kid, you used to run around this garden with that ridiculous bug net, trying to catch crickets.”
Luke blinked, caught off guard. “Uh.”
“You were terrified of spiders,” his dad continued, smiling softly, “but still insisted you were becoming a world-class bug collector. You even made me build you that stupid wooden box you kept under your bed. What did you call it? Your specimen chest?”
Luke let out an embarrassed groan. “Oh my God, Dad.”
His father chuckled, eyes crinkling. “I thought you were going to grow up to be an entomologist.”
Luke laughed despite himself, but the warmth of the moment shifted when he saw the look on his dad’s face change—softening, tightening, glistening just a little.
“And now here you are,” his dad murmured in a small, nostalgic voice. “Graduated. Top of your class. Speaking in front of hundreds of people like it was nothing.” He swallowed hard. “I’m… ridiculously proud of you, Luke.”
Luke felt the sting in his own eyes before he could stop it.
His dad cleared his throat. “And next week… you’re having surgery.” His voice wavered. “I know it’s what you want. I know it’s going to make your life better. But it’s still a lot for a parent to take in. We… we’re watching our child go into an operating room. It’s a big thing.”
Luke’s breath caught.
“I’m not scared of the surgery,” Dad said quietly, turning to him. “I’m scared of something happening to you. You’re my kid. My little bug catcher.” His voice cracked. “But I’m also so proud of the man you’ve become. I’m proud that you’re brave enough to live your life exactly how you need to.”
Luke couldn’t stop the tears now. They slipped down his cheeks silently.
Dad reached out, thumb brushing them away. “Hey. None of that. You’re strong, Luke. Stronger than anyone I know.”
Luke sniffed, voice trembling. “I’m just… nervous. I keep thinking something’s going to go wrong.”
His dad pulled him into a side hug, warm and solid. “Nothing is going to go wrong. Your mom and I will be there every step of the way. And afterwards, when you’re resting at home… I’m going to spoil the hell out of you.”
Luke let out a watery laugh. “Yeah?”
“Oh absolutely. Soup, crackers, every flavour of jelly. I’ll even buy that stupid overpriced ice cream you like.”
Luke laughed harder, leaning into his dad’s shoulder. “You don’t have to do that—”
“I want to,” his father cut in gently. “Because you deserve to be cared for, and because I love you. And because you’re probably my favourite son, but don’t tell your brother that.”
Luke closed his eyes, overwhelmed, letting the words settle deep in his chest. “I love you, Dad. You’re, like, the best parent somebody could ask for,” he whispered.
Luke’s dad let out a long, steady breath, one that sounded as though he’d been holding it for weeks. He kept his arm around Luke’s shoulders, thumb tracing absent circles on his upper arm—something he’d done since Luke was small, something gentle meant to soothe. But the tension in his jaw betrayed how carefully he was choosing his next words.
“Luke,” he said quietly, “can I ask you something… and I want you to be honest with me.”
Luke stiffened. “What?”
His father didn’t answer right away. He looked out across the garden again, as if searching the flowerbeds for the least painful way to phrase it. “It’s just…” he began slowly, “things seem… different. Between you and Young.”
Luke’s entire body went rigid.
Shit.
His dad must’ve felt it, because he added gently, “I’m not trying to pry, but I saw the way you two kept glancing at each other. The way you hovered near him without even realising it. And the way he kept watching you.“
Luke’s stomach dropped through the patio. He opened his mouth, then shut it. Tried again. “I—Dad, there’s nothing—”
His father gave him a look. The kind that could peel paint off walls. The don’t insult my intelligence look.
Luke’s shoulders sagged. “Youngjae and I…” He dragged a hand through his hair, cheeks burning. “We’re… sort of… trying something.”
His father’s expression flickered. It was a mixture of surprise, worry, and something like oh dear God all fought for space. “So,” he said carefully, “you and Young are together?”
Luke nodded once, tiny and mortified.
“Since when?” Dad pressed.
Luke swallowed hard. “It’s complicated.”
His dad blinked. “Complicated how?”
“Well, we’ve kind of always had this, like, thing.”
“Thing?” his father asked sharply.
Luke winced. “Can you not say it like that?”
His father rubbed his temples. “I’m trying to understand. You… broke up with Noah… and then—”
“No,” Luke cut in quickly. “I mean, yes, but not like that. Noah and I were already pretty much done. And Young—Young’s been…Dad, it’s complicated.”
His father looked as though he wanted to say it doesn’t have to be, but kept his thoughts to himself. A few seconds passed in heavy silence. Then, softly, “Does Gabe know?”
Luke felt actual panic shoot through him. “No. And he cannot know. Please. Dad, please, I’m begging you, don’t say anything to him. Not yet.”
His father studied him, really studied him. The kind of assessing, parental stare that made Luke want to curl up into a ball. “You’re asking me to lie to your brother,” he said carefully. “A brother who adores you. Who worries about you. Who’d throw hands with anyone who looked at you the wrong way.”
“I know,” Luke whispered. “God, I know. That’s why he can’t know. He’d lose it. At me. At Young. At both of us.”
His father didn’t respond immediately, his brows pulling together in a slow, uneasy frown.
“It’s only temporary,” Luke pleaded. “Just… until everything settles. Until we know what we’re doing and how we’re going to tell him. Please, Dad.”
His father sighed and it was a deep, conflicted sound. He scrubbed a hand over his face and looked at Luke with a mixture of protectiveness and reluctant acceptance. “I don’t like secrets in this family,” he said quietly. “Especially ones that could blow up and hurt all of you.”
“I know,” Luke whispered.
“But…” His father paused. “You’re eighteen. You’re old enough to make your own mistakes… and your own choices.”
Luke’s heart thudded painfully.
“And I can see that you care about him,” Dad added.
Luke nodded, cheeks burning.
Another long pause.
Finally, his father let out a resigned breath. “Alright. I won’t tell Gabe.”
Relief washed over Luke so hard he nearly sagged in place. “Thank you.”
“But Luke,” his father said, fixing him with a stern, fatherly stare, “you need to be careful. With your heart, and with your brother’s. Youngjae is living with us for a while. This… situation… could get messy very fast.”
Luke nodded. “I know.”
His father squeezed his shoulder. “Just… promise me you’ll think things through before diving in headfirst.”
Luke tried to smile. “I’ll try.”
His father gave a small, weary smile back. The kind that said I love you, but I’m terrified.
“And I swear to God, no sex under my roof.”
“Dad!” Luke exclaimed, mortified.
Dad laughed and clapped him on the back. “Come on, let’s head back inside.”
“Sure,” Luke nodded. “And thanks for this talk. I appreciate it.”
“Always,” dad smiled softly.
They both stood up, shared a quick hug, and headed back inside.
Luke barely had time to blink before the atmosphere inside the house crashed down around him. He and his father stepped through the back door, still half–deep in their quiet, fragile understanding… only to be met with the sight of Gabe and Young standing near the dining table, voices low but sharp, tension radiating off them like static before a storm.
Gabe’s face was flushed, not with alcohol this time, but with anger. Young looked strained, jaw tight, hands hovering slightly as if he were ready to either defend himself or grab Gabe before he toppled into something worse.
Luke froze.So did his father.
“What’s going on?” Luke asked quickly, stepping forward before he could talk himself out of it.
Both Gabe and Young turned. Young’s expression dropped into worry. Gabe’s snapped into fury.
“Nothing,” Gabe spat. “Stay out of it.”
Luke flinched at the tone, but his dad stepped closer, calm but firm. “Gabe,” he said, “lower your voice. Tell us what’s wrong.”
“I said it’s nothing!” Gabe barked, louder this time. His hands were trembling slightly. Luke didn’t know whether from anger or something deeper.
Luke’s stomach twisted, dread pooling cold and heavy. He stepped closer anyway. “Are you okay?”
“Don’t.” Gabe jabbed a finger in his direction, eyes wild. “Don’t get involved.”
“Involved in what?” Luke frowned.
Gabe just scoffed. “Seriously, everyone needs to fucking calm down, alright?” he snapped, reaching behind him to grab the glass he was drinking from.
“Gabe,” Youngjae muttered under his breath. “Let’s just go to bed, alright?”
“Why should we go to bed when it’s my little brothers celebration night?” Gabe asked, raising his glass towards Luke in a mock salute. “It’s a party, right? So maybe we should actually fucking party, huh? Why the hell is nobody drinking?” he asked, a sharp laugh escaping his lips.
“Gabe?” mom asked in a slightly confused and almost timid voice.
Luke swallowed thickly and glanced at her, then looked back at his brother. “Maybe Youngjae’s right. Maybe you should sleep.”
“Sleep? It’s barely 10 o’clock!”
“But you’ve had a lot to drink and you’ll probably wake up with a hangover tomorrow, so maybe it’s best to call it a night,” Luke said in an unsure voice.
Gabe’s smile faltered. “God, not you too.”
“What?” Luke mumbled.
“Why is everyone on my fucking case recently, huh?” Gabe asked in a loud voice, eyes darting from Luke, to Young, to Maddy. “You all in on some kind of secret or something? Why do I get the feeling that there’s a secret club that I’m not part of?”
Silence hit the room. Young and Luke’s eyes met briefly and they were both thinking the exact same thing; this is getting way out of hand now.
Gabe’s brows shot up. “What the hell was that?”
Luke went cold as he snapped his eyes back to his brother. “What?”
“That,” Gabe gestured between Young and Luke. “That look. What was it?”
“What are you talking about?” Luke asked in his best fake confused voice.
Gabe’s eyebrows furrowed as he looked between his best friend and his little brother a few times. Then, Luke watched in slow motion as the penny dropped and a look of understanding passed over Gabe’s features. He slowly turned to Young, his eyes blazing with accusation. “You told him, didn’t you?”
Young looked caught in headlights. Guilt, sadness and worry colliding behind his eyes. He didn’t speak. Luke didn’t speak either, because suddenly this was the moment he had dreaded.
Gabe saw the silence and his face crumpled into something wounded and livid. “Wow. Wow. So you have been talking about me behind my back.”
“Gabe—” Luke stepped forward, voice cracking. “We’re just worried about you—”
“Don’t say that!” Gabe roared. “Don’t you fucking stand there and act like you know what’s going on with me, Luke. You don’t know shit.”
Luke reeled as though struck.
Young stepped in, voice soft but steady. “Gabe, come on man. Please.”
“Shut up!” Gabe snapped, rounding on him. “You’re the one who told him. You’re the reason he’s looking at me like—” He gestured wildly, eyes bright and unfocused. “Like I’m some kind of broken charity case.”
“Alright, that’s enough.” Luke’s father’s voice cut through the room with unshakeable authority.
Everyone in the room had stopped what they were doing and were staring at the drama taking place in the middle of the room.
But Gabe wasn’t listening to anyone anymore. His breathing was uneven and his anger was spiralling, emotions spilling over in jagged shards. “This is exactly why I don’t talk to anyone! You all think I’m fucked up, right? That I’m, what, a fucking drunk? An embarrassment? A problem you need to fix?”
“No one said that,” Luke’s dad replied steadily. “But you’re shouting at your brother and Young, and that tells me something is wrong.”
Gabe’s eyes darted, unfocused. “You don’t get it.”
“Then explain it,” Luke tried again, voice trembling.
“Luke,” Gabe hissed, “if you keep pretending like you know what’s going on, I swear—”
“That’s enough,” their father snapped, stepping between them with a firmness that stopped Gabe mid–sentence. “You’re upset. You’re overwhelmed. But you do not speak to your brother like that.”
For a moment, it looked as though Gabe might argue. His chest was heaving and his eyes were burning. But then something in him cracked. His stare flicked between Luke, Young, and his father. Then he whispered, “I don’t want to talk. I just want to get out of here.”
Luke’s dad nodded once. “Then let’s step outside.”
“No,” Luke said quickly, stepping forward. “Dad, wait.”
But his father gave him a quiet, warning look. “I’ll handle this.”
He placed a hand on Gabe’s back and guided him toward the front door. Gabe didn’t resist, didn’t fight. He just looked crushed and furious and deeply, painfully lost.
The moment the front door closed behind them, silence exploded through the living room. Young stood rigid, shoulders tense, eyes still fixed on the door as though expecting Gabe to storm back in. Luke felt hollow. Eli and Nate were wide eyed from the other corner of the room. Maddy was frozen where she stood. No one said a single word. Luke’s heart hammered emptily in his chest. He felt sick. Not because of what Gabe yelled, but because for the first time, Luke realised just how fragile his big brother really was and he realised there was nothing he could do about it.
⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧⛧
Luke lay on his bed, curled beneath his duvet, the room dim except for the soft glow of his bedside lamp. His phone was pressed to his ear, Young’s voice filtering through in a low, tired murmur.
“…I just hate this,” Young was saying. “I hate that I’m down here in the cave like some forgotten troll, and you’re up there alone after all that shit.”
Luke let out a small, embarrassed laugh. “It’s not a cave…”
“It is,” Young insisted. “It’s dark, it’s cold, and it doesn’t have you in it.”
Luke shoved his face into his pillow, heat rushing to his cheeks. “Youngjae…”
Young made a thoughtful hum, the kind that told Luke he knew exactly what effect he was having. “Wish I could sneak into your bed right now.”
“Y-You can’t,” Luke stammered. “My parents are still awake. And Gabe’s… I mean… it’s not a good idea.”
“I know,” Young said softly. “Still wish I could.”
Luke’s heart fluttered so hard it almost hurt. He tucked his knees up, suddenly feeling small and warm and overwhelmed. “You can’t just… say stuff like that,” he whispered.
“Why not?”
“Because…” Luke’s voice cracked in mortification. “Because it makes me feel all, you know, stupid.”
Young gave a soft, breathy laugh. “You? Stupid? That’s impossible.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Luke mumbled.
“I know what you meant,” Young replied, gentler now. “It makes you all shy.”
Luke groaned into his pillow. “Stop.”
“I won’t,” Young said simply. “I like it. I like hearing you get flustered over me.”
Luke rolled his eyes.
Young’s tone softened even more, becoming something tender and vulnerable. “Today was… scary, Luke. For Gabe. For you. And honestly? For me too. I kept wanting to go to you. Just grab you and take you somewhere quiet where you could breathe.”
Luke swallowed. “You kinda did.”
Young exhaled a shaky laugh. “Yeah, but not properly. I wanted to hold you. Tonight especially.”
Luke buried his face in the duvet again. “Youngjae…”
“What?”
“You’re making it really hard not to sneak you upstairs.”
A quiet groan came through the speaker. “Don’t say that unless you want me knocking on your window.”
Luke squeaked. “No. You can’t. Stop.”
“I’m serious,” Young muttered. “You don’t know how hard it is not to be there. Hearing your voice like this. Knowing you’re upstairs in your bed and I’m not beside you.”
Luke felt like he might combust. His toes curled under the blanket, every inch of him a flustered knot of warmth. “Well… you, um… you will be. Soon. When we’re all in Boston.”
Young went quiet for a second. Then, soft and aching. “Yeah. I’m counting down the days till I can just come over to your campus and spend all night with you.”
Luke’s heart thudded so loudly he was sure Young could hear it.
“I should let you sleep,” Young murmured. “You’ve had a long day.”
“I don’t wanna hang up yet,” Luke whispered before he could stop himself.
Young inhaled sharply, like Luke had punched the air out of him. “Okay,” he said quietly. “Then we won’t.”
Luke rolled onto his back, staring up at the ceiling, warmth pooling in his chest. His voice was small, shy, deeply sincere. “Youngjae?”
“Yeah?”
“Thank you. For tonight. For… everything.”
The silence on the line was warm, like a hand pressed to his cheek. Then Young replied, voice deep and low and honest. “Anything for you. Always.”
Luke clutched the phone tighter, cheeks burning and heart soaring, completely unable to hide just how hopelessly gone he was.
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