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The nightly readings continued on for the rest of the week and the following day in class we would work on the written portion together. I was approached twice more by different groups of girls either asking if I was single or for my number. Quinn and I did surprisingly well on our presentation considering he had just copied my notes. Noah was pumped I was finally going to a real party and Nik and I met once more at Kaifei Cafe and sat in our spot. Yes, he had said it was our spot. It made me so happy. I tried his black coffee and he tried my cappuccino and we both concluded we didn’t share each other’s taste.
On Thursday night, Thomas and I were nearing the last chapter when he stopped me.
“Were almost near the end,” he acknowledged.
“Oh yeah,” I said, even though I had been dreading the end of our facetimes.
“Maybe we could save the last chapter for tomorrow” he offered.
“That sounds like a great…oh wait…I’m actually going to a…um..a party tomorrow night,” I said, feeling like I had let him down.
“You’re going to Marcus’?” he asked.
“Yeah, unless you want to finish it quickly y’know cause I would be up for that t–“
“I was invited too, wasn’t going to go cause parties aren’t my thing but if you’re going…..maybe it will be fun,”
If you’re going,
“Awesome, do you..uh need a ride?” I asked timidly.
“Oh no it’s alright I have to work so I’ll be late….but thanks,” he said.
A little disappointed, but still okay, we continued reading until it was time to call it a night.
I laid in bed trying to stop the never-ending thoughts that swirled through my head and made me restless. I often struggled with anxiety that kept me awake but tonight was a new level. Would I have been friends with these people if it hadn’t been for that dumb, amazing list? Would I hang out with Noah, Nik, Thomas or try to talk to Marcus? Eventually, my thoughts must’ve lured me to sleep because I woke up half an hour later than I usually do. I jumped out of bed, showered and was on the road before 8:00. When I walked into English Thomas wasn’t in class. I sauntered over to my seat and stared at the door to catch him come in. It wasn’t until Mr.Krone finally told the class to settle down I realized he might not be coming today. Had I said something last night? No, people miss school all the time. Fuck, I missed a whole week when I had strep throat last month. Oh shit, I hope he’s not sick.
I whipped out my phone and clicked on his name.
Me: Hey, you coming today?
I put my phone away before Mr.Krone went on another cell phone policy rant.
For the rest of the day, I checked for any texts from Thomas. A few times I felt the buzz in my pocket only to find it was those girls that had asked for my number the other day. I missed him. I know it was dumb cause it had been like 10 hours? Also we had spoke the most this week we had ever spoken. But still.
I sat with Micha in Chemistry. Micha Lowry was probably one of my closest friends. But you wouldn’t know it from seeing us together. We’d been friends for about a year, simply because we both enjoyed being alone and people didn’t seem to question it if we were being alone together. But there was still friendship in the distance and we would do anything for each other. He was a nice break from the regular social constructs of high school. We sat in content silence, doing our work when I felt a tap, well more of a jab, into my side.
I turned around to see a clearly annoyed-looking Bradford. It took me a few moments to realize it wasn’t him who wanted me, but whoever had given him the note in his hand. In my confusion, I took the note and opened it while Micha peered over.
Will you go out with me?
Are people serious?
I turned around to see Maura giving me a cheeky wave. This is exactly what I didn’t want to happen. Every time a girl has asked me out I, of course, say no, but I can’t help feeling that people will start to ask questions. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad? People get together and are over in a week. I could do that right? No, I couldn’t. How could I do that to another human being?
I responded with a painful shake of my head. Her expression dropped and she proceeded to get her friend to pass a note towards Marcus’ desk.
“This List, it’s made people see you now huh?” Micha said as I pretended to work in embarrassment.
I looked up at him from my blank balancing compounds sheet.
“They don’t see me, they see the idea of me. Made up by whoever wrote it,” I replied, unable to meet his gaze now.
There was a moment of rare awkward silence before he continued.
“Don’t feel forced to become what they want you to be Arthur.”
The rest of the class past in silence. That’s how Micha was. And I was truly grateful for it.
At lunch, I once again went to Kaifei Cafe to see if Nik was there. It wasn’t as crowded today and luckily no one was sitting in our spot. I was scrolling through my messages with Thomas when I heard the sound of a chair moving, and looked up to see Nik and Marcus.
“Hey Arthur, you know Marcus,” Nik said, sitting down.
“Hey Arthur,” Marcus said grabbing a chair from another table.
We chatted about sports and food and coffee but the whole time I couldn’t stop just looking at them. So Thomas was the hottest guy in the school, but these two were very close. And they were genuinely nice guys! Most people literally suck and are shit when it comes to common social etiquette.
“So you coming to the party tonight?” asked Marcus.
“Oh yeah for sure,” I replied.
“Sick, my cousin’s buying the drinks so were all set,” Marcus said, sipping his coffee.
I laughed nervously and I think Nik could tell cause he quickly changed the topic.
“Hey..uh Arthur?” Nik asked me as we walked back into the school.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t feel like you have to drink tonight if you’re worried about it,” he said.
I felt my face go red.
“Was it that obvious?” I asked jokingly.
“Course not, you could be an alcoholic for all I know just don’t feel pressured about tonight,” he said reassuringly.
I walked back into the school less nervous and more excited. Hopefully, Thomas will be there.
That night I found myself staring at my closet. What the fuck do you wear to a party? Thomas still hadn’t texted me back and I was starting to get worried. Fuck I’m overreacting, I bet he’s not pacing his bedroom wondering when I’ll text him. I decided to text Micha and see if he wanted to come. Then I at least wouldn’t have to go alone. He replied right away.
“Thanks for the invite but I’ll pass. Parties aren’t my thing.”
There was a moment before he texted again.
“Be careful, if you need me, call.”
Micha was a good friend. Parties weren’t my thing either so who was I kidding?
At dinner, other than the usual murmurs of “put your phone away Christopher” and “pass the dressing”, there wasn’t much conversation. As I put my plate into the dishwasher my Mom called out to me.
“Arthur honey, pack a bag quickly,” she said while cleaning off the table.
“For what?” I asked confused.
“We are visiting your dad’s sister this weekend? Did you forget?” she stated more than she asked.
“No I didn’t forget, you didn’t tell me, I have plans tonight, “I replied.
“Of course I told you. You never told me, you had plans” she said, becoming agitated.
“Mom I told at dinner on Monday,” I said returning the agitation.
“Well your coming with us,”
For some reason, I didn’t do what I would normally do. Things had changed. People were starting to like me for me. So I made it clear.
“I don’t want to. I’m staying.”
I then left the kitchen and walked upstairs to my room. Fuck my parents for never listening to me. I wasn’t going to my dull aunt Angela’s house where I would pretend to think sauerkraut was a real meal over the party. And I certainly wasn’t spending the weekend there.
There was a faint knock on my door and I knew it was my brother Chris. Of course, my parents would send him to try and persuade me rather than face their own son.
“What do you want?” I asked.
“Why don’t you want to come to Angela’s?” He asked through the door.
“Is that a real question?”
There was no response so I whipped open the door and he stumbled into my room.
“I’m going to a party tonight okay? Maybe you could cover my ass just this once like I always do for you when you go to parties,” I said stating the facts.
“Okay fine man, we’re leaving now I guess…..see you Sunday,” he said, leaving my room and heading downstairs.
I heard the front door shut and from my window, I watched my family pile into the car.
I had a party to go to.
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