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A/N: Warning. This is an emotional chapter, I teared up while writing this. I listened to Say Something by A Great Big World while writing this, it fits for this chapter.
“Gah,” Evan yelled while watching Sammy drive off down his driveway. Throwing his hands into his hair he angrily turned around to see Maci filing her nails.
“I don’t know why you’re so upset, he was annoying.”
“He’s not annoying! He was hurt by what you said to him. Why do you have to be such a bitch Maci?”
He watched as she gasped, holding her hand up to her mouth. “How dare you?”
“How dare I for telling the truth?” He angrily yelled while walking past her into the house.
Feeling anger bubble up into the pit of his stomach, he suddenly hit the wall next to him, making a small hole appear in the wall. Groaning, he sat down onto the couch while staring at the coffee table in front of him, feeling like a terrible person. “God I hope you’re not this mean around the babies, because if that’s the case you can be a single parent.”
Closing his eyes he tried to block out Maci’s voice, wishing it was Sammy’s sweet voice instead. He wished he wasn’t so scared about being with him, he wished he hadn’t let him go. He wished Sammy knew he was falling in love with him.
When he felt the couch dip he looked up to see Maci slowly sitting down next to him. She was quiet for a while until he noticed tears were slowly making their way down her cheeks as she asked, “You love him, don’t you?”
Looking away from her eyes he stared blankly at the wall while whispering, “Yes. I do. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to abandon you.”
“I can’t be with you if you love someone else Evan, that’s not fair to me. It’s also not right for your daughters.”
Glancing over at her, he tried to imagine having a life with her. He tried to imagine his daughters running around the yard, Maci entertaining guests while he grilled hamburgers. However no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t picture Maci in his life.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered while gently taking her hands. “I really wish I could say I love you, but I just can’t. You deserve someone better than me Maci, you deserve someone who will actually love you. I will always be there for our daughters, because that was something I did. I’ll always take responsibility for being their father, and I will never love them any less.”
“That’s good because AH!”
Evan watched as Maci suddenly screamed while she held her stomach. “What’s wrong!?”
“Something… something isn’t right…” she whispered while they both looked down to see the front of her pants covered in blood.
“Oh my god,” Evan said while reaching for his phone. After dialing 911 he anxiously waited for the ambulance to come, as Maci was still screaming in pain.
When the ambulance arrived he got into the back, while paramedics were trying to keep Maci conscious. “What’s happening… what’s wrong?” Evan suddenly yelled when he saw Maci’s eyes start to roll into the back of her head.
No one answered him as they were trying to start her heart, while he grabbed her hand. Feeling tears run down his cheeks he deeply cried when he saw her suddenly take a deep breath when they got her heart beating again. Slowly glancing over at him she weakly smiled at him while whispering, “Take care of them. Don’t let them turn into trouble makers,” she said while nodding down towards her stomach.
“No Maci, you’re going to be fine. Look at me, Maci. It’s going to be okay.”
More tears were running down his cheeks when she slowly nodded no before whispering, “No, it’s not.”
Looking up Evan realized they were at the hospital, where even more nurses and doctors were rushing over to them. When they took her back to look at her, he had no idea that that would be the last time he saw her.
Sitting in the waiting room he called his mom, who instantly rushed over. By the time his mom showed up a doctor was walking out. Getting up, he practically sprinted over to him while asking, “Is she okay?”
“I’m sorry. We tried everything we could.”
“Wh…” Evan whispered while his voice cracked. He felt tears run down his cheeks as his mom wrapped her arms around him. “No, she’s okay. Where is she? Maci!” He started to yell as he tried to get around the doctor.
His heart broke when the doctor blocked his path while saying, “Listen to me, we did everything we could for Maci. I am extremely sorry, but we were able to keep your daughters stable.”
“M-my daughters?” He asked as his voice cracked once again.
He watched as the doctor suddenly pulled him back into a room, where two very tiny little bodies were lying in incubators. Crying harder he slowly walked into the room before looking between the two of them.
“You’re going to be okay,” he whispered while looking between the two small bodies. “You’re going to be okay.”
*
The saddest thing Evan has ever seen in his life was having to watch Maci’s parents receive the news of their daughter passing away. He learned that Maci had a placental abruption, her placenta completely separating from the uterus. Usually death is not common, but apparently the placenta in Maci’s uterus had ruptured so badly, there was nothing they would be able to do.
When her parents saw the two little babies, Evan felt his heart drop when they said they wanted nothing to do with them. Apparently they were a disgrace, and killed their daughter. “Excuse me?” Evan asked, not believing what he just heard. “Those disgraces happen to be my daughters, my daughters. They also happen to be your grandchildren.”
“No grandchildren of ours would ever kill their mother,” Maci’s mother said while her father nodded in agreement.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” He yelled. “They’re babies! It’s not like they took a fucking axe to her head.”
“We want nothing to do with them,” Maci’s father said while pulling his wife down the hallway, the last time he would probably ever see them.
Throwing a chair across the room, Evan screamed in frustration as he sunk to the floor. He felt his mom wrap her arms around him, as he cried in her arms.
*
When he had finally stopped crying, Evan slowly walked back into the room where his daughters were fighting for their lives. They were very premature, both being only a couple pounds. Looking between the two tiny bodies, he smiled while putting his chair in between them. “Hi,” he said while clearing his throat. “I’m your dad. And I want you to know that you’re going to be okay.”
Closing his eyes he took a deep breath, trying to hold in his tears. He needed to be strong for them, his daughters. “I’m always going to love you two more than anything, and I know your mom would have too.”
He smiled as he slowly reached his pinky fingers into each incubator, feeling a small hand. Looking between them he sighed while staying with them for the next few hours. Every time a nurse would come in they would ask if he picked out any names for them yet, which of course he hadn’t even thought about. Him and Maci hadn’t gotten around to thinking of names quite yet, they still had a couple months.
However as he was sitting with his daughters, he felt an instant bond to both of them. The next time a nurse came in he said, “Izzy and Ryleigh.”
“I’m sorry?” The nurse asked.
“Their names are Izzy and Ryleigh.”
He watched the nurse smile before writing their names down in front of them. “Those are very pretty names, for very pretty girls.”
The next time he left the room was only to relieve his bladder. He made sure his mom was in the room with the girls, he never wanted them to be alone. When he was walking towards the bathroom he passed a guy who looked a lot like Xander.
Turning around he scrunched his eyebrows together while asking, “Xander?”
Xander slowly turned around, making Evan realize his eyes were bloodshot. “What’s wrong?”
“You don’t know?”
“What?”
He watched as Xander ran a hand over his face before saying, “It’s Sammy. He got into a car crash, it was pretty bad. They had to put him into a medically induced coma because he has internal bleeding.”
“Wh… what?” Evan whispered, feeling as if his whole world was suddenly collapsing. “Where is he?”
“Third floor, room 204.”
Running towards the stairs, Evan took them two at a time before he reached the third floor. Sprinting down the hallway he stopped when he reached room 204. Glancing inside he saw Sasha and Sammy’s father in the room, Sammy’s still body on the bed.
When he walked in they both looked up at him. “Evan?” Sasha asked while wiping his eyes. “Where were you?” He suddenly yelled while pinning his larger body onto his on the floor.
“What the hell?” Evan yelled as Sammy’s father was trying to pry his son off.
“Where the fuck were you when my brother almost died?”
“Watching my girlfriend die!” Evan yelled back, instantly making tears form into his eyes.
“What?” Sasha whispered as he was pulled off of his body.
Evan watched as Sammy’s father helped him up as he said, “Maci passed away. That’s where I was.”
“I’m so sorry.”
Glancing over to Sammy, Evan frowned when he saw his small body. This was all his fault, he always hurt Sammy. He either hurt him physically or mentally, but this was the worst. Looking back over at his family he whispered, “Can I have a moment with him?”
“Of course,” Sammy’s father said while pulling Sasha out of the room.
Sitting down onto the bed, Evan took one look at Sammy before he started crying. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered while gently touching his cheek. Glancing down he saw the necklace he gave Sammy still around his neck, making him feel worse. Frowning, he gently took the necklace off before putting it into his pocket.
“I’m sorry Sammy. I’ll never be the one for you, I hurt you too much. You need someone much better than me; you won’t have trouble finding anyone. I can’t stay here,” Evan whispered while looking at Sammy’s still face.
“I can’t, I have to leave. I’m leaving you because I love you too much,” he started saying before his voice cracked. “I hope you’ll forgive me someday, for running your life. I want you to move on, move on to bigger and better things. Maybe we’ll meet again, but then again maybe we won’t. Please don’t hate me,” he whispered as he leaned his forehead against Sammy’s.
“I’ll always love you.” With that he ever so gently kissed Sammy’s cheek, before leaving not only the room, but Sammy’s life.
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