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“Bye Mum, bye Dad!” Ella called. Jeremy also bade them goodbye, following his sister and cousin to Cassidy’s car. He didn’t want to be in the same car as them, but he had little choice. He wasn’t about to get dropped off to the party by his parents, and Cassidy was already seventeen and had her provisional driver’s licence unlike he and Ella, so he grudgingly agreed to go with them. He couldn’t even remember who was throwing the party, but he needed a chance to get out of the house. He needed one night to forget a certain person who kept popping up in his thoughts like persistent acne. Though Ashad was far more attractive than acne.
Shut the fuck up, Jeremy! He groaned internally. Maybe this plan just wasn’t going to work.
“Hey, is your boyfriend coming tonight, Jer?” Ella teased.
It was almost as though she’d read his mind. Jeremy felt his face going hot. He glared at Darcy, who shook their head to indicate they hadn’t tattled on him. “I don’t have a boyfriend, El. Who are you talking about?”
“Ashad, you dipshit.” Ella grinned. She looked like she was about to say more, but Cassidy caught her attention and started bitching about some girl from their music class. Jeremy sank down in the back seat, relieved to be off the hook for now.
When they arrived at some two storey house, the music was already audible from the car. They parked and the four made their way inside, squeezing past what seemed like fifty people in the open plan kitchen and dining area. The lights were low and Jeremy could hardly hear a thing beneath the heavy bass. He followed Cassidy’s lead to the improvised bar on the benchtop. He didn’t care that he was underage, he needed a bloody drink. Jeremy poured himself a couple of shots of what seemed to be vodka (though he couldn’t read the label properly in the dim lighting) and tossed it back, gasping at the sting in his throat. He grabbed a bottle of beer for good measure and made his way to the backyard where he found a few girls he vaguely knew from his chemistry class. His usual anxiety at being in such a dense crowd seemed to have dissipated somewhat, probably due to the alcohol. He hoped it would numb him even more.
A few hours (and drinks) later, Jeremy found himself dancing wildly with a bunch of unfamiliar girls. It was a strange experience; he felt detached from reality by his slowed senses, and yet he was so connected to the moment at the same time. The bass flowed through his veins like water through rapid rivers, and his movements didn’t feel forced like they so often did. He didn’t even notice that the girls weren’t laughing because they were having a good time and that they were laughing at him. He felt relaxed, happy even.
“Suck that, Ashad,” he mumbled aloud, the sound stolen away by the music. He cringed at his poor choice of words. He shook his head, remembering what it was that he was trying to forget. “I’m fucking straight!” he shouted. Even then his voice could hardly be heard over the beat, though a couple of the girls near him looked confused. Had they heard him? Jeremy didn’t even care right then. He just wanted to dance.
Jeremy caught a glimpse of glasses and a mop of dark hair. “I’ll be back!” he announced to the group, chasing after Toby through the crowd. He found himself in some hallway with no Toby in sight. People had paired off and were busy making out against the walls all around him. Jeremy wrinkled his nose and looked for a way back to where he’d come from.
A hand grabbed his arm and pulled him aside. “Ashad?” Jeremy asked, a slight sense of panic breaking through the barrier that the vodka had provided.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Ashad yelled over the music. Jeremy shrank back, unable to tell whether he was angry or just trying to make himself heard. “Are—Are you drunk?”
“Sure I am, genius, that’s why I smell like beer.” Jeremy tried to keep a cool demeanour, but he was fairly sure that Ashad could see right through it.
Ashad didn’t even acknowledge his comment. “Okay, we need to leave.” He grabbed Jeremy around his waist and tugged. “This is—”
“No!” Jeremy frowned adamantly, trying to pull away. “I’m staying here. I’m having fun, see?”
Jeremy felt Ashad’s grip on him tighten. “You’re so skinny,” Ashad said with concern. “You look really unwell, actually. Have you been eating properly?”
Jeremy looked away from Ashad’s pitying eyes. “Don’t look at me like that, you sick fuck.”
“Like what? I want to help you—”
“Then stay out of my life! Stay out of my head!” Jeremy could feel his throat becoming tight. Oh, no. He did have a tendency to become emotional when he was drunk.
Ashad retained his hold on Jeremy. “What do you mean, out of your head?”
Jeremy looked back at his face. It was a mistake. Ashad looked so… vulnerable. His eyes were wide with confusion. His hair was slightly mussed, which was unusual because he always looked so put together. And that damn mole on his cheek—
Words weren’t enough. So Jeremy took Ashad’s face in his hands and pressed their lips together.
This time, Jeremy was the one who wanted it. He wanted to feel the tenderness of Ashad’s lips against his, he wanted to feel himself drawn in uncontrollably. Ashad was the one left surprised this time, but he slowly leaned into it, backing Jeremy into a wall and pinning him there, captive to his kisses. Jeremy gasped when he felt a hand slide around his waist to cradle his lower back, but his breath was stolen once again, and he closed his eyes. Ashad pressed his body close, leaving no room between them at all.
And then his warmth was gone. Jeremy opened his eyes in shock, intoxicated by the brief bout of passion, and saw what Ashad must have seen.
Toby.
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