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*** Trigger warning!
—
Only a few days had passed after Josh’s little break down and Tyler’s small confession. Josh was told he could ask any question he wanted and Tyler would respectively answer but Josh hadn’t even brought it up. He hadn’t touched on it in days, despite being told so little and he was on edge. So much so Tyler took notice and discussed everything with Joan before he acted.
“Come on, Ty, we’re going to be late.” Josh said, shaking Tyler so he could get up and get dressed.
“No.” Tyler said plainly. He sat up on the bed on his phone. Josh looked confused at the response.
“Tyler, seriously. Come on.”
“No, we’re not going to school today.”
“But we have to.”
“No we don’t. It’s Friday, I told your mom, she called the school; we’re home free. We’re staying home. Josh looked at Tyler with wide eyes and disbelief.
“Well, uh, why?” He became flustered. He’d never really done that before and he knew Tyler wouldn’t have them stay home for no reason so he was anxious to know why it was happening now.
“Because you and I need to have a talk, Josh. I confessed about having that problem and you haven’t even touched on it since. I see you get uncomfortable so, why haven’t you said anything?” Tyler pulled Josh down on the bed to sit down and kept their hands together.
“I don’t know…” Josh hung his head low. “I don’t know. I just thought you’d be mad if I did because I would seem annoying and pesky.”
“Oh, no way. I told you that you could ask me anything.”
“I know but sometimes people say things to make others feel better and I thought that was what you did…”
“Of course not. Go ahead, ask me anything. I won’t be mad or annoyed, babe. I promise.” Josh nodded and at least twenty questions were forming already in his mind.
“Uh, what drugs were you on?” He asked, sitting crossed legged. Tyler gave Josh a small smile before talking.
“Just like heroin and stuff. I never went past heroine for hard drugs. Anything else was mild, you know? Weed and stuff.” Tyler rolled up his sleeve. “See? Those are track marks from those times.”
“That’s what those are? I’ve seen them on you but I didn’t know what they were.” Josh eased up a bit. The conversation wasn’t as awkward as he thought it would be.
“Yep. What’s next?” Tyler said, rolling his sleeve back down. Josh looked up from his arm.
“Uh, did you ever do it with someone or was it just like a party thing?” Josh played with his hands as he asked.
“Oh definitely with someone. Though there were parties I did them at, it was usually over one of my good friends’, Ryan, house.” Tyler’s mood plummeted with just the mention of his old friend. He missed him so much.
“Who’s Ryan?” Josh tilted his head. He had noticed Tyler’s facial expression go from caring and attentive to thoughtful and out of it.
“He was a real buddy of mine. Knew him since the third grade, you know? We did a lot of good stuff together but then when we reached freshman year we just went downhill.”
“Were you guys not friends anymore?”
“No, we were. We just.. We started drinking and smoking and stuff. That was what we did for a while then we got into the heavy shit like that heroin and we just derailed… Especially Ryan..” Tyler trailed.
“Well surely he’s okay now, right? You and your mom said you got better so wouldn’t she help him too?”
“No, no… Ryan couldn’t be helped… He had different plans. Different goals. One night, uh, we were in his room getting high again and he just decided it was over for him I guess..” Tears swelled in Tyler’s eyes as a flashback of that dreadful night filled his thoughts.
—
“Hey, Tyler?” Ryan slurred, pointing at his friend. Tyler couldn’t speak considering he wasn’t lucid enough to and instead nodded his head, struggling to keep his eyes fully open.
“I love you, man. You take good care of yourself and I’ll see you later, alright?” He finished, grabbing a full needle and injecting himself one final time. Tyler’s eyes shot open and he stumbled over to Ryan, trying to remove the needle from his arm before he could do anything but he was too late. Ryan had already done it and he lied there with a stupid grin on his face, waiting to pass. Tyler began crying and made his way to the nearest phone so he could try and dial 911. It took a while but he finally did it.
“Hello???” He practically yelled into the phone.
“Hello, 991, what’s your emergency?” The woman spoke on the other line.
“My friend… My friend. Help him?” Tyler tried his best to make sense.
“Sir? Are you okay? Are you under the influence of something?”
“It was the drugs. He took too much this time. You have to help him. Please.” Tyler whined, grabbing his stuff so when the ambulance came he wouldn’t get busted and sent to jail.
“Okay, sir. Just relax, okay? Can you tell me what he took?” The woman asked in a hurry.
“No, no. You’ll send me away.” Tyler shook his head.
“No we won’t. There’s a law that protects you just for this situation. Just stay put, an ambulance is on its way. Could you please tell me what you both took?”
“Heroin. Please help my friend. I don’t want him dead.” Tyler hung up, stumbling out the door. Though the woman told him to stay put, he didn’t want to risk it and went around the corner, sobbing the whole way.
—
“They, uh, brought him to the hospital and tried to help him but he was already gone by the time they got him in.” Tyler wiped away stray tears as he continued to hold Josh’s hand.
“Oh, Ty, I’m so sorry.” Josh said with worry plastered all over his face.
“It’s okay. It’s just that… You’d think I’d stop, right? Wouldn’t want to end up like Ryan and never even go near that shit again, right?” Tyler asked, rhetorically. “Well that’s not what I did at all. I upped my high days, did it at home while my folks were home, skipped school to do it. Everything. I remember one time my dad coming in, seeing me on the floor with a needle hanging out and that is when he’d had a enough of that. I just felt so depressed without him. He was my only friend. The only person I had to really be with and he killed himself. It was hard but my parents sent me to rehab for what seemed like forever. I relapsed twice so I had to be in there for a year. Surprised I didn’t stay back, honestly. But what matters is I’m here now and I’m clean and I have an amazing boyfriend to keep me happy.” Tyler gave a small smile to Josh.
“I love you so much.” Josh said with his quivering lip, pulling Tyler in for an overdue hug. Tyler muffled an ‘I love you too’ into Josh’s shirt and chuckled.
“Let’s just chill for the rest of the day, okay?” Josh suggested. He could tell Tyler was worn out and figured this was the best option for them both anyways. They stayed in bed all day, eating junk and watching random television shows all while enjoying each other’s company.
***
Bam.
adios *
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