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Wow the Roman’s were kinky af.
Please ignore me.
—
“We’re going to sit in and just watch over the first part of the hearing just so you know what’s going on, okay?” Taylor explains.
“I don’t think I’m ready, Tay.” I whimper.
“You are, Kells. You’ve got this. There’s a bunch of people here keeping you safe. You see that man over there, the one with the big muscles,” she says pointing to a scary looking man waiting by the entrance to the courthouse. He’s very muscular and serious looking. “he’s a security guard. There’s at least twenty more men and women like him that are here to keep you and everyone else safe.”
I feel a lot better after hearing that.
“You know neither Vivian nor I would ever let anything happen to you.” Papa says and I nod.
He’s right. And neither would Vic. If Vic thought that I would be in danger then he would never have let me come here.
“Are you ready, kiddo?” Papa asks and I nod.
We go through the door into a room where there’s a lot of chairs. Taylor, Papa and I take a seat at the back of the room. There’s an African-American man at the front of the room, sitting behind a tall bench with a small hammer in front of him. On either side of him there is an empty chair.
At the front of the rows of chairs, there’s a women sitting in a seat with Jordan sitting beside him.
“Who’s that girl with Jordan?” I ask Taylor.
“That’s your lawyer. She is the best we could find. She’s very good at what she does.” Taylor explains. “She’s the lady I was telling you about. She’s going to be asking you a lot of questions. And that man sitting over there,” she points to the other side of the isle, “he’s your parents lawyer, he’ll also be asking questions.”
I nod and wipe my sweaty hands on my pants.
At that moment a door opens from across the room and in bright orange jumpsuits and handcuffs, my parents enter. They’re being escorted by police officers.
I grab Papa’s arm and bury my face in his shoulder.
“They can’t get to you, Kells.” Papa tells me.
“I know. They’re just scary.” I whisper.
“You have no reason to be scared them anymore. They should be scared of you.” he says and I look at him confused.
“Why should they be scared of me?” he frowns slightly.
“Because you’re going to be the reason they’re going to prison for the rest of their lives.” he says and I start to feel bad.
“But that will ruin their lives.” I frown.
Tay sighs and squeezes my shoulder.
“Kellin, they ruined your life, remember? Think about all the horrible things they’ve ever done to you. Think about how they make you feel. Think about all the pain and all the wounds they’ve inflicted on you.” she says.
I do what she tells me and can’t help but to start crying.
“I don’t want to see them ever again.” I choke out.
“You won’t have to after today. They’ll be put away for life. You just to remember all the things we’ve been through. Run them by me, what are they?” Tay asks.
“Um, answer each question honestly. Tell them if I don’t understand. Only speak when spoken to. Remember that I’m the victim, I’ve done nothing wrong. Call a break if I need it. Remember that I’m safe and I’m loved.” I answer, repeating the things that I’ve been learning for the last few months.
“That’s right, kiddo. High-five.” Tay grins holding up her hand.
I high-five her and turn to Papa.
“Papa, if it’s okay and not too much trouble, can we get ice-cream later?” I ask quietly. It’s not often I ask for much, I’m still quite nervous to.
“Yeah Kells, definitely.” he smiles.
I smile to myself and look towards my parents. My father is looking back at me. His skin is pail and scabby like I remember. His face is sunken in, his eyes have dark bags under them and there’s a nasty scowl on his face that I’m too familiar with.
I smile at him, showing him that I’m not afraid of him, that he should be afraid of me, that he can’t hurt me anymore, that even though he and Mother hurt me I’m okay and I have better parent figures now who treat me right.
He scoffs at me and turns away but I continue to smile.
“I’m ready to do this.” I sigh.
—
“How would you describe Kellin’s behavior and mannerisms when he first arrived with you compared to him presently.” the lady asks Mama.
“Initially, he was so anxious, so timid all the time. There was an instance where he accidentally dropped a glass and broke it, at no fault of his own. He broke down, apologizing profusely and begged us not to hurt him. There’s less instances like that but they still happen. It’s better as he learns to trust people. Strangers and large crowds are still a lot for him. He had an anxiety attack at the airport on our way here. He’s improving though. His self confidence is a lot better too. When he first arrived, he was convinced he was too stupid to go to school. On the plane over, he proudly told me he got a C+ on his math test. He’s just generally happier, more confident and he’s physically and mentally healthier.” Mama explains.
I love hearing her talk about me. She says the nicest things.
“How would you describe your relationship with Kellin?” the lawyer asks.
“I’d say close. We have a mother-son bond that just came naturally. I treat Kellin as if he’s my own. He calls me Mama. Yeah, I’d describe our relationship as close.” she smiles, locking eyes with me. I give her a smile then she looks away.
“Would you say Kellin is comfortable confiding in you? Has he done so before?” she asks.
“Definitely. But I think Kellin’s just very open in general. I don’t think he’s learnt to keep things to himself. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. It’s allowed me to get a great insight to his feelings and his previous situation.” she explains.
“Ah, so he has told you things about living with the accused?” she asks and Mama answers with a ‘yes’. “Can you elaborate on that?”
“He has gone into detail about the living conditions, the fact that he hasn’t had a bed for the last thirteen years, that he’s slept on the cement floor in the basement. He hasn’t talked too much about the abuse. I don’t think he likes to think about it. The neglect becomes obvious in every day life. Just the little stuff, like he hasn’t tried a lot of things, a lot of foods. Victor, my husband, had to teach him about puberty and sex, just things that he should already know. He even has trouble doing his buttons up on his shirts, not from lack of motor skills but from lack of education.” she explains.
I feel a little embarrassed. Everyone in this room is hearing how incompetent I am. But I guess none of it is my fault.
They ask Mama a few more questions then she steps down from the stand and leaves out a door.
“Who’s next?” I ask Taylor.
“Jenna is next. Then it’s me and then you.” she explains. “I’m going to sit with Jordan, but Viv will join you soon.”
I nod and hug her quickly before she gets up and quietly sits at the front of the room.
“I’d like to call the expert witness, Dr. Jenna Mcdougall.” the lady says.
Jenna comes out of the door Mama just went through and gives me a smile and a little wave.
They make her place her hand on the Bible and swear to tell the truth then the lawyer starts her questioning.
“Dr. McDougall, how do you know the victim?” the lawyer asks.
“I’m his current attending paediatrician since he moved to San Diego.” she explains. I’m surprised I know the term she used. Guess reading those medical textbooks paid off.
“So you didn’t assess him on the day of his removal?” the lawyer asks.
“No, I did not. I’ve read thoroughly through the medical report and have had meetings with the doctors that were on call that day. At that time, Kellin needed immediate medical care. On the day of the removal from the residency, Kellin endured a severe beating.” Jenna says seriously. It’s odd to see her not smiling.
“How bad were the injuries sustained on that day?” the lawyer questions.
“There was severe bruising to both flesh and bone, he had a gash to the head and multiple grazes to his legs, back and arms.” Jenna answers. “I have the images here with me that were taken that day.”
She hands a folder to a man who then puts them under a projector thing. A photo of my bruised, bleeding face pops up on a screen. I have to look away because the sight is unnerving. I’m glad Vic didn’t come.
I bury my face into Papa and he hugs me tightly.
Jenna talks in medical terms about the physical damage caused to my body whilst living with my parents and soon she’s asked to step down from the stand.
She leaves then Mama sits by my side. I pull away from Papa and hug her instead.
“Are you doing okay, Kells?” she whispers softly.
“This is hard.” I choke out.
“I know, honey. It’ll be done soon. We’re halfway through. Do you want to stay for the sentencing or go home?” she asks.
“I want to go home.” I sniff.
“Okay. Taylor’s going to talk then they’re going to call a recess. Then it’s your turn and we’ll be out of here.” she says and I nod.
“I’m hungry.” I whisper.
“Half an hour max. then we’ll get something to eat.” she says and I smile at the thought. I remember a time when I’d go hungry for days, sobbing because the pains were so bad. Now I only have to say that I’m hungry and I’m allowed to have food.
Taylor takes the stand and they ask her a lot of questions.
“After reading through the journal he wrote in, I was astonished that he’s even alive. It seems like the abuse and neglect was daily. He wouldn’t see or hear from them unless they were hurting him. And it wasn’t just physical abuse either, it was psychological abuse. I’d like to read a passage from the journal that I’ve bought with me today.” Taylor says clearing her through and I get nervous. This is so embarrassing. “Today Mother and Father were acting weird. They weren’t yelling at me. They even let me upstairs to watch TV.”
I swallow hard and hug Mama tighter, remembering this day clearly.
“I found out why they were acting weird. I was watching TV in my underwear because Mother wanted to wash my clothes. I thought that was nice of her. They’ve smelt bad ever since it rained and they got wet. I was watching Spongebob when my mother turned off the TV. She then told me to come give her a hug. I was confused. She’s never hugged me before. I was uncomfortable because Father was watching. When I didn’t hug Mother she got mad so I hugged her so she wouldn’t hurt me. But when I tried to pull away she wouldn’t let go. Then I heard Father take off his belt then he started hitting me in the back with it. It hurt so bad. Mother didn’t let go until I passed out. I can’t sleep now. My back hurts. I hope they leave me alone tomorrow. I don’t ever want another hug again.”
Taylor clears her throat and wipes some tears from her face.
It hurts me to see her crying. I don’t want to make her sad.
“Do you know how long the abuse occurred overall?” the lawyer asks.
“Since Kellin was old enough to walk. That’s around the time his parents drug addiction got out of hand.” Taylor explains and I’m confused. Drug addiction?
They ask a few more questions then my parents lawyer decides they want to cross-examine the witness. I don’t know what that means but the lawyer starts asking Tay questions.
“Miss Jardine, in your professional opinion, would you say that the use of methamphetamines would have triggered this alleged abusive behavior in the defendants?” he asks.
“I’m not a professional on the affects of drug use.” Tay answers.
“Okay, fair enough. In your personal opinion? From your prior knowledge.” he questions and Tay looks nervous.
“No.” she answers not confidently.
“Why not? Can you elaborate?” he smirks.
“I, uh, w-well I mean yeah, it is possible, I think. But as I said, I don’t know, I’m not a professional.” Taylor stutters out.
“So you’re saying that the drugs could have caused this alleged abuse?” the lawyer asks.
“No, that’s not what I’m saying. Sure the drugs could have, from what I know, made the defendant act out of character but there had to be an initial hatred, an initial violent attitude towards Kellin. This abuse had to stem from somewhere and maybe the drugs magnified that.” Taylor states.
“But you’re not a professional in the affects of substance abuse?” he asks.
“No.” Tay frowns.
“That’s all, your honor.” the lawyer concludes finally.
The judge says a few more things then everyone starts getting up. Mama and Papa each take one of my hands and guide me out of the room.
“I saw a little cafe on the corner. We’ll get some lunch there, yeah?” Mama asks and I nod.
“Is Tay and Jenna coming?” I ask.
“They’ll be along soon, I’m sure.” Mama answers.
I nod and we go down to the quiet cafe down the street. Papa gets me some sandwiches and some peppermint tea then we take a seat.
At first I eat in silence, but the questions from the trial are swimming around in my head.
“Mama, why did Taylor get nervous when she was asked questions? Should I be nervous?” I ask.
“The lawyer tried to trick Tay. You have nothing to worry about. If a question is asked that your lawyer and Tay don’t feel is right for you, they’ll object to it and you’ll be asked another question.” she explains and I nod.
“Mama, I don’t want to cry in front of everyone. I’ll look like a baby.” I frown, knowing that it’s going to be difficult for me to talk about my parents especially since they’re there.
“Its okay to cry, Kell. It’s normal and no one’s going to blame you. If I was in your situation, I’d cry too.” she explains.
“Okay.” I breathe. “What did Tay mean about my parents drug addiction?”
Mama looks confused at first then a little sad.
“Kellin, your parents were addicted to crystal meth. That’s an illegal drug. That lawyer was trying to say that your parents abused you because of the effects of it. That could possibly get your parents time off their sentence. I don’t think it was primarily the drugs that caused your parents to do that.” she explains.
I nod, a little shocked.
It’s not long before Tay and Jenna come back looking stressed.
“They’re testifying.” Tay mutters as she sits across from us.
Jenna rubs her shoulder in a comforting mutter.
“They’re testifying?” Papa screeches.
“I know. It’s unbelievable.” Tay huffs.
“They can’t possibly have an advantage though. Kellin’s testimony should be enough to convict them, right?” he questions hopefully.
“It should be. I just don’t know what their angle is.” Tay sighs.
“It can’t be that good.” Papa says
“Let’s hope so.” Tay sighs.
She then turns to me and looks a little grim.
“Kell, your parents have decided to answer questions as well so instead of you going next, it’s them.” Taylor explains and my heart sinks.
“I just want to go home.” I frown.
“I know, Kells. It’ll be over soon. I promise.” Tay murmurs and I nod.
“Can I call Vic?” I ask Mama.
“Sure thing sweetie.” she smiles, pulling out her phone and handing it to me.
I stand up out of my seat and kiss Mama’s cheek before walking out of the cafe and standing in the cold. I call Vic and wait anxiously for him to answer.
“Hello?” He chirps answering the phone.
“Hey Vic.” I mumble.
“Everything okay, Kells?” he asks.
“I miss you and I want to go home.” I choke out.
“I know, bub. I miss you too. Just a few more hours and you’ll be home in my arms.” he says.
“I’m not strong enough for this.” I admit, pushing back tears.
“That’s bullshit, Kells, and you know it.” he says seriously. “You’re stronger than anyone I’ve ever met. You can push through this. I know you can.”
“Okay. If you believe so.” I whisper.
“I do. I love you, Kells.”
“I love you too, Viccy.” I murmur.
“I’ll see you when you get home, okay?” he says.
“Okay. Bye Vic.” I breathe then hang up.
I go back inside the cafe and find everyone standing up.
“Ready to go, Kells?” Mama asks and I nod, giving her back her phone.
I’m not ready but this is something I need to do.
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